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Would you still like someone if they did something you are against of?


MissSarangKpop

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It was just a question that popped into my head, and I thought it would be interesting to see others perspectives of this.

For example, I absolutely dislike people who smoke (sorry), because I was raised with my parents always nagging me not to smoke and smoking is bad etc. So, if there were someone I really like, and they smoke, what would I do in that sort of situation?

How would you handle liking someone though they do something you completely disagree on?

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It depends in the severity, If you idk, if you get around a lot to say something, or expell more smoke than a chimmey, I won't necessarily break bonds with you.

 

But I had a friend that became a neo-nazi. Pretty much that was enough to stop talking to him.

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That's a very vague question.

Would I stop being friends with someone who smokes, or drinks to excess? Not unless they're inconsiderate about it (blowing smoke in my face like an asshole, expecting me to play taxi for their drunk ass).

 

Would I find I no longer have a crush on someone who does either of those (or worse) things? Yes.

Would I break up with someone who smokes? If it was made clear they had no intention of ever trying to quit or they were an asshole about it, absolutely.

Would I break up with someone who drinks to excess? I don't have a problem with someone getting drunk every once in awhile, so long as they take precautions and are responsible with their own safety and that of the people around them. But the on-the-way-to-a-ruined-liver kind of behavior... that crap is out of my life now and it's staying out.

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depend. if it's someting stright out bad like he's turn out to be a beater or drug user then no, I won't still like him. but if it's something that I can tolerate because it doesn't really affect how I live my life then yes I will still like him. there's no 2 people with 100% agreement in life

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A lot of my friends smoke, and even though I absolutely despise smoking, I sort of just ignore it.

 

I'm probably too forgiving though. One time my friend started kissing the girl he knew I liked right in front of me, but I forgave him after barely any time. I sorta feel like I let him off too easily for it, but that was like 5 years ago now and we're still friends and she didn't turn out to be all that great of a person anyway.

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i'm not a very forgiving person at all  :wth:

 

i feel pretty strongly about my convictions, so if someone uses derogatory or discriminatory language in front of me i just tune out, it's so unattractive to me that continuing to like them is out of the question

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Well, it depends on what it is. I'll compromise on certain things, so long as they do the same for me. But at heart, we all have certain values we can't allow for any leeway on. Some things shouldn't be compromised or you'll find yourself in a very miserable relationship.

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Being in a relationship in someone is (or should be) a matter of your emotions. Think about what they've done. Answer two questions to yourself:

-Has it done any changes on how you feel about them as your patners? If so, how?
-Is it damaging to you personally?

First question will tell you if a crush or love still remains in the same shape it did before, and second will tell you is it ok to go irrational and love them all the way no matter what ~ it's important because once people perform harming activities on us, it does not have to trigger our reasoning senses and our mind might be overshadowed by emotions we feel towards them.

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Something like smoking, no. I'm a neat freak, and my wife is comically messy at times. It's all about finding someone you click with and figuring out how to meet them in the middle.

 

If she was racist or liked to gamble all our money away (gambling is, to me, just really dumb), that's something else. There's a line.

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If it's something that I absolutely dislike, then I would talk to them about it and ask them to quit it, but if nothing changes, even after having several conversations about it, then I would have to think about the relationship that I'm in.

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Depends on what it is.

 

I try to compromise for the most part if it's something I feel like we can work together so that it benefits both of us, but even after we do that and it's still not working then it's best to call it quits. I don't like trying to change people or asking them to change unless it's something that's harming them (smoking, drugs, etc.)

 

I'm not saying that I won't still like the person cause I probably will, but it will just be a major turn off if they do something I'm against.

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