ItzMadame2U 569 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Say, for instance, that you've had a long time feud with someone online in a community that you frequented often in the past and still sometimes came by to participate. Only now, it has been quite some time since you last outwardly beefed with them. Within that time span, you've changed your once recognized identity (just for the sake of playing with the settings and changing up for fun), so now that user you loath so much doesn't recognize you immediately. You've also grown up a lot personally, so the things that you quarreled about with a particular user are completely trivial, irrelevant to you, and childish; so much that if faced with circumstances similar to the past, you would be in a much better and mature state of mind to discuss the very same topics/controversies. With that, the likelihood of clashing on various issues are minimal. Nevertheless, because of the extreme past confrontations between the two of you, no matter how much you have grown and are now willing to see other things differently, you still harbor ill feelings toward that person, mainly because of a naturally embedded response you've developed towards them. Not necessarily holding a grudge, but just holding a negative general view towards that person and keeping your guard held a bit higher when dealing with that person. NOW, after all of the aforementioned facts are established, this person - not knowing that you were....you (the person they once beefed with, and they also probably held a similar attitude towards you, too!) - recognizes you as person they would like to befriend based on their own reasons. They innocently assume you are someone else. After it's all said and done, knowing that you have bad blood, do you reveal yourself? Do you remain bitter towards them? Do you reveal yourself, but also with the likes of moving on and giving them the chance? What do you do? ..... P.S., sorry if this sounds foolish or doesn't make sense, but I'm literally almost one blink away from entering a deep sleep, my eyes are even crossing lol so sleepy!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamayam 1,081 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Woah its kinda complicated. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
。Beach Angel 。 955 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 i'm literally 5 seconds from flicking you in the eyesocket. Like They're really not that important. At all. Do what's the most comfortable you're with. But, I would just not talk to them, I would reveal myself if it comes up but honestly.... lol focus on people you like. You're not supposed to have the personality of a brillo pad are you? Go to bed you aint thinking right no more. Woah its kinda complicated. Good luck most definitely complicated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knee 2,642 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 wtf its a forum get over it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyeballs 2,036 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 I'd probably reveal myself and try to have a new start with them. IDK though, whatever suits you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
High Fructose Yoongi Syrup 7,149 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 i dont hold grudges in the internet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meth Krystal 18,630 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 this is so relevant ^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ 730 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 reveal yourself and ask if they're still ok with it if not, get into feud part 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muffin 315 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 I'd give them a chance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nyny_68 1,048 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 if its my opinion, then i'd say tell them who you are, and then, based on their response, you can get over your history and be friends, or not.. because just like you've grown and changed, they would've too right?? and off the bat, since i get the impression that you don't really communicate (*in any way, negative or otherwise) you can't judge your feelings for them accurately - for all you know, they might be someone now that you'd want to know!! and if things don't go that way, if they still carry a grudge, or if you DO talk and then find out that whatever problems you had still persist, then, you can always end it later, right.. in the end, since you said you don't frequent the community as much now as in the past (or something like that?? anyway, again, thats my impression) its not as big a part of your life that this even needs to be that big an issue for you, am i right? Just take it lightly|| Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fufu 580 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 When I used to be on gfx sites, I used to have a rival who I would argue for hours with. After a few years and name changes, we eventually just let our pasts settle half by acceptance and half by slight ignorance of each other's aliases. I think old animosities die as you both age, and you realise how futile it all was. Ironically, I became much better once I realised how much time i'd wasted opposing said person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ItzMadame2U 569 Posted July 26, 2014 Author Share Posted July 26, 2014 i'm literally 5 seconds from flicking you in the eyesocket. Like They're really not that important. At all. Do what's the most comfortable you're with. But, I would just not talk to them, I would reveal myself if it comes up but honestly.... lol focus on people you like. You're not supposed to have the personality of a brillo pad are you? Go to bed you aint thinking right no more. most definitely complicated. Lol!! xD okay, I'm going to beddy bye, but I guess not revealing myself would be simpler, especially if it doesn't come up. Yet, there would forever be this internal conflict. if its my opinion, then i'd say tell them who you are, and then, based on their response, you can get over your history and be friends, or not.. because just like you've grown and changed, they would've too right?? and off the bat, since i get the impression that you don't really communicate (*in any way, negative or otherwise) you can't judge your feelings for them accurately - for all you know, they might be someone now that you'd want to know!! and if things don't go that way, if they still carry a grudge, or if you DO talk and then find out that whatever problems you had still persist, then, you can always end it later, right.. in the end, since you said you don't frequent the community as much now as in the past (or something like that?? anyway, again, thats my impression) its not as big a part of your life that this even needs to be that big an issue for you, am i right? Just take it lightly|| I like this answer! I'd elaborate, but I'll just say I like this perspective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sully 4,318 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 i would tell them who I was and that I can't accept their friend request. Even if I had matured past petty bickering online, I still wouldn't want to talk to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grape Soda 12,004 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 i changed my name awhile ago......do u know who i am? hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
potaeto 1,933 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 It's just a forum; don't worry so much and do what you want Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Symphonyâ„¢ 11,329 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Cyber it out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Fei 742 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 You can do whatever it suits you, try to start again with that person. you can choose to reveal yourself or not. in my case i wouidn't do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluesclues 5,048 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Reveal yourself definitely. There may even be a possibility that the other person doesn't even remember. Whether you'd like to move on and be friends depends on whether you feel comfortable with it. But you should definitely privately talk this thing to it's death with that person, directly. Personally, if I have a negative view of someone that usually doesn't change so pretending to be friends wastes too much time and energy for me. I'd rather just reveal who I am, state my position, get feedback from them if they have any, and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
˹AS˼ 3,610 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 I wouldn't reveal myself based on what you said. Why? Because even though you said you've matured mentally, what's the image that will be shown when you reveal yourself? Someone who actually HASN'T matured because they still have a grudge against someone who already forgot about them. I say let it go. If you think you've matured and a while has gone by since you two fought, don't you think the other person has gone through the same situation as you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
✷Stardust✷ 1,966 Posted August 25, 2014 Share Posted August 25, 2014 well, the person probably know who you are now. Or at least have a guess. Or maybe not But, after all that was said I think its best if you keep on talking with that person. I mean its really up to you if your gonna keep on holding on to that negative outlook on that person or if your gonna give yourself, and that user a chance to be friends at least. You've said so yourself, You've grown up personally, I guess its time for you to prove that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miyami 642 Posted August 25, 2014 Share Posted August 25, 2014 There is really no reason to 'reveal' yourself lol. Just move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abra 40,910 Posted August 25, 2014 Share Posted August 25, 2014 reveal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yeongwonhi 1,416 Posted August 25, 2014 Share Posted August 25, 2014 i'll say who i was in the past, but i'd honestly like to try to be friends with them, and forget the past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teru 22,363 Posted August 25, 2014 Share Posted August 25, 2014 you can't build a relationship on a lie, so I would just tell them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.