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OneHallyu

Can I peddle my fics here?


jvers

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Who are the people in your story even?

 

Anyway I'm not into your writing style...too shallow, basic vocabulary, no attention paid to descriptions, it feels rushed. Gives me the impression that you just want to get to the part with the cheesy relationship, instead of focusing on character development.

 

I'm not trying to bash, I'm just pointing out that you could write way better.

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Hmm.. I scanned the first two chapters. To honest with you I have to agree with the above poster. The vocabulary is basic and there are too little descriptions. Also, bots of random korean like "Anyeongie" is an eye sore and puts the fic out of place, I wouldn't recommend you do that unless you use titles, like hyung or dongsaeng. 

Also, you don't need so much spacing in between paragraphs and dialogue. Like:

 

Paragraph

 

 

 

Paragraph

 

 

 

Paragraph

 

 

 

 

Dialogue.

 

 

You don't need to do that. I'd definitely advise you to work one more descriptions, even if you have to squeeze it out of you. Also, make sure you proof read the entire thing before publishing. I see a lot of spelling errors. And sometimes when proof reading you also catch awkward sentence structures and things you could change.

If you need anyone to help you with writing or anything please feel free to come to me. I'm very experienced and I'd love to give some advice. And don't be ashamed of your fic (bc I see you edited it out of your post), we're just tryna help you improve~

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