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Would you sign a prenup before getting married?


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I don’t know how many countries have it but it’s basically an agreement that if the marriage ends in divorce, both parties will keep their own money and assets. Because here in the U.S. if you get a divorce, the person who makes more money will have to give the other person half or something like that, idk. Usually something that rich people do. 
 

I don’t think I would ever sign it, if I was the lower income person. But if I was the richer one, I would probably sign it. I can be a hypocrite like that if I wanna be. 

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I guess.  It depends.  A prenup generally protects your assets gained before marriage.  It doesn't protect your assets gained during marriage.  So you and your ex-spouse still split half of what was gained during marriage, because during marriage it's considered both yours and your spouses, even if a prenup is signed.  So if the two of you buy a house during your marriage, even if it was with "your spouse's" money (that is, money they made from their job), the house is still both of yours, even with a prenup.

The reason I'd be iffy is I suppose it still feels wrong to me to plan for divorce.  But I understand the desire to protect one's previously gained assets, especially if it's things, like, inherited from one's family, and whatnot.  But if my SO asked me to sign a prenup it still feels like they'd be saying to me "I think we're gonna get a divorce and you're gonna try to screw me over."  It's not really a vote of confidence you'd want from someone you're planning to be with for the rest of your life, especially in difficult times.

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, spopo said:

I guess.  It depends.  A prenup generally protects your assets gained before marriage.  It doesn't protect your assets gained during marriage.  So you and your ex-spouse still split half of what was gained during marriage, because during marriage it's considered both yours and your spouses, even if a prenup is signed.  So if the two of you buy a house during your marriage, even if it was with "your spouse's" money (that is, money they made from their job), the house is still both of yours, even with a prenup.

 

It's the opposite for us I assume? It protects assets gained during marriage not before, which I think is more logical. 

Edited by lighterxx
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3 hours ago, spopo said:

I guess.  It depends.  A prenup generally protects your assets gained before marriage.  It doesn't protect your assets gained during marriage.  So you and your ex-spouse still split half of what was gained during marriage, because during marriage it's considered both yours and your spouses, even if a prenup is signed.  So if the two of you buy a house during your marriage, even if it was with "your spouse's" money (that is, money they made from their job), the house is still both of yours, even with a prenup.

The reason I'd be iffy is I suppose it still feels wrong to me to plan for divorce.  But I understand the desire to protect one's previously gained assets, especially if it's things, like, inherited from one's family, and whatnot.  But if my SO asked me to sign a prenup it still feels like they'd be saying to me "I think we're gonna get a divorce and you're gonna try to screw me over."  It's not really a vote of confidence you'd want from someone you're planning to be with for the rest of your life, especially in difficult times.

Thank you for clarifying this

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Posted (edited)

The reason I wouldn’t sign is because of power. If I have less money/assets, and I sign the pre-nup, then you take away a lot of my power in the marriage. And the richer person often already has more power in the first place. It depends but yeah.

Edited by marin karin
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5 hours ago, marin karin said:

I don’t think I would ever sign it, if I was the lower income person. But if I was the richer one, I would probably sign it. I can be a hypocrite like that if I wanna be. 

 

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I am married and we don’t do that. I don’t have a plan to divorce too. What he has is mine too. Just as simple as that. I am more focus on my children such as their educations etc. 

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What's sketchy to me is a partner who isn't okay with signing a measly little thing to protect our assets in the *worst* case scenario

I would rather marry a rational, reasonable person than a person who swears up and down they'd never divorce me

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1 hour ago, seokii said:

What's sketchy to me is a partner who isn't okay with signing a measly little thing to protect our assets in the *worst* case scenario

I would rather marry a rational, reasonable person than a person who swears up and down they'd never divorce me

I second this.

The divorce rate where I live is astronomically high. I've lost count of how many of members of my own family, and friends, that have gotten a divorce before and during my lifetime. Heck, both of my parents are divorcees, they were never married to each other but to other people, and they would have greatly benefitted from signing a prenup.

I'd be foolish not to sign a document to protect my assets when the time comes.

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3 hours ago, seokii said:

What's sketchy to me is a partner who isn't okay with signing a measly little thing to protect our assets in the *worst* case scenario

I would rather marry a rational, reasonable person than a person who swears up and down they'd never divorce me

Right, it’s always strange when folks go “you don’t trust me? You don’t believe we will be together forever?”

😑 
 

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Depends on what's in the prenup. It needs to cover infidelity and if we have children. There's some other things but those are the biggest two in my mind that definitely need to be discussed.

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