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I think I'm genderfluid..


plutto

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This is the first time I'm speaking about this to someone else other than my own self... I trust a bunch of internet strangers more than people I actually know.

 

So... I'm assigned female at birth and never really had a real problem with it. The thing is, I also flirt a lot with the idea of being male... and it's a weird feeling. I know I'm not trans because as I said before I'm okay with being female, being adressed by other people as a girl, etc. But I can't help but think of myself as a boy sometimes.

 

Usually, I relate way more to guy characters than with girl characters in fiction and even in real life sometimes.

When playing a game, I'm more likely to choose a guy character (when playing the sims, I always create a male sim to represent myself in the game)

I like to dress in a "masculine" way, although I also like to dress in a "feminine" way sometimes too with skirts, dresses, make up, etc.

 

This is not a new thing to me. When I was way younger (like, 12-14yo, I'm 18 now) I used be really confused with my gender (and it was something weird because at the time I didn't know anything about gender... the only thing I knew was that there were trans people, but even so I thought only trans girls existed). I would say sometimes that I wanted to be a man and feel tingly inside when people adressed to me as male in the internet.

Since then I just "settled" with being a girl only and moved on... Since then I would feel this feeling about wanting to be a boy but I would pay no attention to it. It was kinda "triggered" by random things like me styling my hair in a way it looks like it short.

Then, recently, this feeling became so strong I couldn't ignore it anymore and decided to finally define it.

 

I came to the conclusion that I'm genderfluid after thinking about a popular singer from my country, who happens to be genderfluid (Pabllo Vittar). She was assigned male at birth and is a drag queen and from what I remember, when she is in her drag queen persona, she likes to be addressed as female and when she is not she likes to be addressed as male. I think this is the best way to explain myself..

 

So yeah... I think I'm genderfluid. Thanks for reading :)

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hi!!! I get the trusting randoms on the interest more than people you know IRL thing lol trust me.

Wishing you well with your journey of self discovery and hope the best for you :) and if you ever need a random stranger on onehallyu to talk to about these things I am here 

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3 minutes ago, Nofave said:

hi!!! I get the trusting randoms on the interest more than people you know IRL thing lol trust me.

Wishing you well with your journey of self discovery and hope the best for you :) and if you ever need a random stranger on onehallyu to talk to about these things I am here 

Thanks :))

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sometimes its easier to speak to a stranger than someone you actually know and trust so yeah it aint unusual

I personally think you shouldnt pressure yourself to define what u are as a specific word if you don't feel like it but if you do then thats fine

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I'm glad you've come to terms with this! It might be confusing at times even after accepting yourself, but it seems that you've been doing just fine with that :ohbi: I hope if you come out to people around you they'll be accepting or at least willing to understand :lovestruck:

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5 minutes ago, Rei-chama said:

sometimes its easier to speak to a stranger than someone you actually know and trust so yeah it aint unusual

I personally think you shouldnt pressure yourself to define what u are as a specific word if you don't feel like it but if you do then thats fine

I kinda was already doing that while paying no special attention to it, but when the feeling became stronger it started to bother me that I didn't know what it is. I feel confortable with identifying myself as genderfluid, so it's not really a bad thing :)

4 minutes ago, WinnerWinnerChickenDinner said:

I'm glad you've come to terms with this! It might be confusing at times even after accepting yourself, but it seems that you've been doing just fine with that :ohbi: I hope if you come out to people around you they'll be accepting or at least willing to understand :lovestruck:

Thanks ❤️

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1 minute ago, plutto said:

I kinda was already doing that while paying no special attention to it, but when the feeling became stronger it started to bother me that I didn't know what it is. I feel confortable with identifying myself as genderfluid, so it's not really a bad thing :)

Thanks ❤️

That's nice then hope you're happy :ahmagah:

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I remember thinking you were a guy for so long and being surprised when you said you were a girl. I think gender fluid suits you :lovestruck:

Wishing you the best in discovering who you are. Labels aren’t that important in the scheme of things but it must be nice to finally have a some sort of description of how you feel.

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2 minutes ago, coval said:

I remember thinking you were a guy for so long and being surprised when you said you were a girl. I think gender fluid suits you :lovestruck:

Wishing you the best in discovering who you are. Labels aren’t that important in the scheme of things but it must be nice to finally have a some sort of description of how you feel.

This is really flattering lol

Thanks!

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It's absolutely fine! Take your time, and don't trust those who will tell you it's not a real thing or whatever!

Just one thing, you said you know you aren't trans because you don't care if you're addressed as a girl. Well, I'm not really sure about that? Some trans people, especially some non-binary folks, are okay with being addressed with the pronouns linked to their assigned gender, even if it's probably not the majority of them. Just something to think about, maybe? It really depends on the person obviously.

Good luck on your journey, you're not alone!

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So is that what gender-fluid means then? I don't mean to be rude, I am simply curious. Because I may be experiencing the same thing as you. Except that I'm a guy and I'm gay, and sometimes I think about myself as a girl. Sometimes it also crosses my mind that I should try wearing women's dresses, but I have never really done it. I'm not gonna lie, I was raised in a culture that only recognizes the binary system, so for the longest time, that's the only concept that I was familiar with. But these past few years, I learn more about genders -- like those who identify themselves as non-binary person and prefer the "them" pronoun. And now I'm starting to question myself. Am I just a gay guy or am I something else? Either way, it's still a process for me, a quest that I am currently doing, so I am still deciding.

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28 minutes ago, Glou said:

It's absolutely fine! Take your time, and don't trust those who will tell you it's not a real thing or whatever!

Just one thing, you said you know you aren't trans because you don't care if you're addressed as a girl. Well, I'm not really sure about that? Some trans people, especially some non-binary folks, are okay with being addressed with the pronouns linked to their assigned gender, even if it's probably not the majority of them. Just something to think about, maybe? It really depends on the person obviously.

Good luck on your journey, you're not alone!

Well, you're right, I haven't thought about it... But I still don't see myself as trans, so yeah...

Thanks ❤️

22 minutes ago, Ronnie Mars said:

So is that what gender-fluid means then? I don't mean to be rude, I am simply curious. Because I may be experiencing the same thing as you. Except that I'm a guy and I'm gay, and sometimes I think about myself as a girl. Sometimes it also crosses my mind that I should try wearing women's dresses, but I have never really done it. I'm not gonna lie, I was raised in a culture that only recognizes the binary system, so for the longest time, that's the only concept that I was familiar with. But these past few years, I learn more about genders -- like those who identify themselves as non-binary person and prefer the "them" pronoun. And now I'm starting to question myself. Am I just a gay guy or am I something else? Either way, it's still a process for me, a quest that I am currently doing, so I am still deciding.

Yeah, although there is not a "definite" concept to genderfluidity. There are also other definitions that are in the "non-binary" umbrella. You should look more about it :)

I hope you can find and discover yourself just like I did. Good luck ❤️

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I'm glad you get to talk about it on the internet. Gender fluidity is hard to define and since we live in binary oriented societies it kinda confuses some people that are questioning and exploring their identity, I remember I read this story about a trans-woman that actually discovered she was gender fluid after she fully transitioned and she couldn't identify that because she felt she needed to belong to one camp but in fact she belonged to both camps. 

I wish you all the luck on your journey 😍 

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4 minutes ago, Le kwan said:

I'm glad you get to talk about it on the internet. Gender fluidity is hard to define and since we live in binary oriented societies it kinda confuses some people that are questioning and exploring their identity, I remember I read this story about a trans-woman that actually discovered she was gender fluid after she fully transitioned and she couldn't identify that because she felt she needed to belong to one camp but in fact she belonged to both camps. 

I wish you all the luck on your journey 😍 

Thanks! ❤️

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