KaniPi 2,626 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 I am a size 10-12, and pear shaped so I am thinner at the top then the thighs/hips/butt are a bit fuller, and I have always seriously hated my body. I hate that I have to think twice before buying clothes, and I have always envied women who were slender. Everything fits them they can wear whatever they want. I have never had anyone tell me (in real life) that I was fine the way I was. I especially fucking hate speaking to my mom about it, because she never ever ever tells me that I should love myself. I actually tested her one time "I'm really fat aren't I?" and her reply was "Yeah a little bit, not that much. Not like before..." then I said "Ah, I actually am then. I should just eat salad and nothing else". Then she said "Yeah, that seems like a good idea." Today I said, "I should get liposuction on my thighs, make them much smaller." then she said "Yeah you should." I do exercise regularly, and I don't really eat that much at all, but my shape doesn't really change. I feel really shitty because I don't want fucking advice, I just want someone to tell me that I am OK as I am, and I should do these things to feel better for myself not anyone else, but I never get that from her. Also I heard her talking bad about me with her friend calling me fat, when I confronted her about it, she said I was in denial. What the fuck? I would know myself if I needed help. I see myself in the fucking mirror every single day. Maybe that's why I find it so hard to believe anyone would ever like me. I wish my Dad was still alive, my Mom just makes me feel bad about myself. Never comforted me ever. Then she acts like she fucking cares, when I do things for her. No wonder I am a fucking mess. Not once has she talked about my depression, its always about her. I just really hate myself, so much. I wish I died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cake mf 1,737 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 beat her at her own game call her ugly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaniPi 2,626 Posted September 30, 2018 Author Share Posted September 30, 2018 beat her at her own game call her ugly She's not ugly though... and I wouldn't call her that even if I hated the way she treats me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cake mf 1,737 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 She's not ugly though... and I wouldn't call her that even if I hated the way she treats me. eh the quote goes "today i started treating everyone the way they treat me...now i have no friends" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaniPi 2,626 Posted September 30, 2018 Author Share Posted September 30, 2018 eh the quote goes "today i started treating everyone the way they treat me...now i have no friends" I still have no close friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cake mf 1,737 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 I still have no close friends. i'll be ur friend bb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pinky Winky 1,232 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 that sucks. My mom is like that too, but even more straight to the point lmao. Don't let her get to you. Your life doesn't only revolve around your mom's opinion of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bronx. 2,763 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 first how old are you? stop asking and listening to you mother. it seems like she's having some personal issues and she's trying to make you feel bad being pear shaped rocks, especially now when its trendy. if you're overweight. find a good healthy diet and stick to it and also train. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparkle dust 1,841 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 Most mothers are like this, if you and your mom dont have the type of relationship where you are friends etc. this type of straight to the point conversation is very normal. Dont let her affect you and also dont give her the chance to say more since it seems like that is what you are doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Usagi. 13,668 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 I'm sorry to say this but your mom is quite toxic. As much as people can think this is not an usual situation, it is because we all atre taught to hate ourselves. You said you hate your body and want to be more slender, do you know what i ofter hear from people who ARE slender? They want more curves. So why do you hate your body, truly? Who told you that having a "pear shape" makes you less gorgeous? It makes me so sad to know that honestly, all women feel unconfortable with their own body, or face, or hair, or really anything... and why? It's pretty clear that we are just taught to hate ourselves, your mom probably was taught to hate herself so she is telling you to also hate yourself. My only advice is..... life is too short to keep coming after stupid stadarts that you probably will not or will suffer too much to achieve, you are pretty, I'm sure of that, everyone is with their own individualities, everyone has a body of their own, and your individualities are what make you you. Don't fall for what your mom conviced you, it's bull, you don't have to make a lipo, people only want to make you insecure enough to spend money with it, some kind of industries only work because people are taught to hate themselves. Use the clothes you want, eat what you want, exercise when you want, love yourself and be happy. beat her at her own game call her ugly IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilsone 187 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 I am a size 10-12, and pear shaped so I am thinner at the top then the thighs/hips/butt are a bit fuller, and I have always seriously hated my body. I hate that I have to think twice before buying clothes, and I have always envied women who were slender. Everything fits them they can wear whatever they want. I have never had anyone tell me (in real life) that I was fine the way I was. I especially fucking hate speaking to my mom about it, because she never ever ever tells me that I should love myself. I actually tested her one time "I'm really fat aren't I?" and her reply was "Yeah a little bit, not that much. Not like before..." then I said "Ah, I actually am then. I should just eat salad and nothing else". Then she said "Yeah, that seems like a good idea." Today I said, "I should get liposuction on my thighs, make them much smaller." then she said "Yeah you should." I do exercise regularly, and I don't really eat that much at all, but my shape doesn't really change. I feel really shitty because I don't want fucking advice, I just want someone to tell me that I am OK as I am, and I should do these things to feel better for myself not anyone else, but I never get that from her. Also I heard her talking bad about me with her friend calling me fat, when I confronted her about it, she said I was in denial. What the fuck? I would know myself if I needed help. I see myself in the fucking mirror every single day. Maybe that's why I find it so hard to believe anyone would ever like me. I wish my Dad was still alive, my Mom just makes me feel bad about myself. Never comforted me ever. Then she acts like she fucking cares, when I do things for her. No wonder I am a fucking mess. Not once has she talked about my depression, its always about her. I just really hate myself, so much. I wish I died. ok listen no you are not and you dont need someone to tell you that! Everyone has difficulties when buying clothes, some are too thin, too much muscles, big butt, big boobs evt.... you dont have to be slender to fit clothes perfectly! if you want to lose weight then do it for YOU not for anyone else, its your life live it as you want it not as you been told to and believe me no one will regret it more than you if you listen to them. Also I think your mother has her own problems as well, it seem she is dealing with something idk what and thats why she is like that to you... And Im sure you have heard that alot but I will say it anyway, if you dont love yourself then how do you expect others to, start to love yourself and the rest will come eventually. by the way if you need a friend.... I can be your friend =) She's not ugly though... and I wouldn't call her that even if I hated the way she treats me. thats very big of you, and the right thing to do, dont treat her like she does to you, be better than her Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cake mf 1,737 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 I'm sorry to say this but your mom is quite toxic. As much as people can think this is not an usual situation, it is because we all atre taught to hate ourselves. You said you hate your body and want to be more slender, do you know what i ofter hear from people who ARE slender? They want more curves. So why do you hate your body, truly? Who told you that having a "pear shape" makes you less gorgeous? It makes me so sad to know that honestly, all women feel unconfortable with their own body, or face, or hair, or really anything... and why? It's pretty clear that we are just taught to hate ourselves, your mom probably was taught to hate herself so she is telling you to also hate yourself. My only advice is..... life is too short to keep coming after stupid stadarts that you probably will not or will suffer too much to achieve, you are pretty, I'm sure of that, everyone is with their own individualities, everyone has a body of their own, and your individualities are what make you you. Don't fall for what your mom conviced you, it's bull, you don't have to make a lipo, people only want to make you insecure enough to spend money with it, some kind of industries only work because people are taught to hate themselves. Use the clothes you want, eat what you want, exercise when you want, love yourself and be happy. IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIM u already know how i am Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villanelle 585 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 Stop talking to her about your weight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JiMiJu 1,858 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 Being pear shaped is normal for women. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilies 2,186 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 Your mom is awful. I wish I could talk some sense into her. It's perfectly normal to have a pear shaped body. Even if you don't have a perfect body you can love yourself the way you are. I had a similar problem with self consciousness and body image back when I was in high school. I'm too skinny and all my friends had beautiful curvy bodies so I've always envied them. I tried my best to gain weight but nothing worked. I discovered after a long time that it's useless to worry myself about my weight. Life is short and there are many stressful things in our everyday life so why adding another problem? I learned after years that being happy and confident with the way I look is the best thing I could do. My body is beautiful the way it is and I'm healthy so why should I worry myself about some stupid curves? So yea, I think that you shouldn't worry much about your body. It's a normal thing to not have a perfect body. Bodies come in different shapes after all. Be happy and grateful that you're healthy and I'm sure that your view on your own body will change with time. Enjoy your life, love yourself. wear whatever you want and don't listen to the terrible and toxic words of your mom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
金彩媛 1,795 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 don't rely on your mother (or anyone) to feel good about yourself you gotta work your confidence on your own Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YuMing 4,176 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 that's horrible as long as you're healthy nobody should be ashamed of their body type alksjfglkdjkflgdfg if she doesn't understand that's her problem, maybe try to avoid the topic in the future because she isn't listening? but anyways it doesn't matter what she thinks, you're beautiful and you don't need someone to tell you that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutroTear 1,189 Posted September 30, 2018 Share Posted September 30, 2018 I'm sorry your situation is like that. Also, if you are thinking of killing yourself, please talk to someone. I know it's hard, but you have to learn to love yourself. I'm not that pretty by society's standards, but I'm still happy with myself (It did take a long time to get here though). As long as you love yourself and are happy with yourself, other people's words shouldn't matter. Find strength, OP! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibiscus 69 Posted October 1, 2018 Share Posted October 1, 2018 I'm sure your body is just fine, your mom is just being trashy about it what on earth ughh. Family members seriously just don't understand to what extent their comments can hurt other relatives :/ such a freaking let down. Your mother should just back off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arineunha 352 Posted October 1, 2018 Share Posted October 1, 2018 jsut do an excercise, there's in a butt exercise you can do to tone your body shape especially your thigh area and stomach area (i've started doing cardio, and it's making a difference) you should try it. don't hate your body, there's always way you can improve yourself some girls diee to have a bigger butt, it's just a matter of toning it i have a bigger stomach before because my meds- are supposed to make me gain weight anyway, on top the lack of exercise. my mom has no problem putting me down on my appearance but i just ignored her, she says nothing now since I told her to stop because it makes me feel sad. she stopped though she still does it on occasion just tell your mom how she makes you feel when you say that just cut the toxicity out of your life if she doesn't listen to you and continues with her verbal abuse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brume 693 Posted October 8, 2018 Share Posted October 8, 2018 I feel bad to hear that you have a mom like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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