My friend is being an asshole! She's implying my new body isn't good

[EasySteezy]

Talk of Eating disorders here, so if that bothers you you might want to click back

 

 

This time last year I had an eating disorder. I was afraid of "getting fat", so I would starve myself. We are talking one meal a day and light snacks. and if I ever ate A LOT I would throw up until it was all gone. I wasn't even fat! I was 95 lbs and 5'2 (43.0 kg 157 cm). But I was deathly afraid. Fast forward to this year. I'm working out a lot (30 minutes on a light day 1 hour on aheavy day) and eating three meals a day and eating tons of protein (100g a day) I gained weight too (I'm now 101lbs 45.8 kg). Despite the weight gain I actually lost a couple of inches on my waist and am now 22 inches (55.88 cm).  and now I have lines on my stomach and gained inches on my butt (squats)

 

Yesterday I was shopping right, and I found an outfit I liked. This matching short crop top and skirt. I thought I looked super cute in it, but wondered if it was too dressy for just going shopping, seeing movies, etc. So I texted my best friend (who knows all about my eating disorder past and how I used to not eat etc) asking what she thought. And she was all, " ummmm its not your style." and I asked what she meant. She said, "you look skinnier than usual and that's not good" Now keep in mind she's been on vacation for a month and in that time period I trimmed an inch off of my waist. I explained to her that it's because my obliques are getting stronger which trims your waist down and she's like, "hmmm." I said, "dude, this is my new body, this is my new waist. I've been being healthy finally and this is the look I was trying to achieve when I was throwing up and all." Then she has the nerve AFTER ME EXPLAINING that this is what my body looks like when I'm having a healthy balance of diet and working out she's all, "Well, okay, if it makes you happy I guess"

 

 

WHAT?! I was mad she had the nerve to say that. She would be IN THE RESTROOM with me as I'm throwing up at a restaurant. At first she was supportive of me being healthier, but as soon as she saw how skinny I got (with muscle definition I feel like I should add) she's being mean

 

Do you think I'm maybe taking it too personally?

[tenxuxi]

maybe she's jealous... you're doing so well though i'm really glad you found a healthier way to achieve ur goals.. just ignore her and don't let her bring u down and also drop the workout routine <3

[sparkle dust]

maybe she's jealous... you're doing so well though i'm really glad you found a healthier way to achieve ur goals.. just ignore her and don't let her bring u down and also drop the workout routine <3

Why should she drop the workout routine? Even if she is fit working out is really healthy no matter what weight you are 

Ignore your friend and continue living the healthy life style she wishes she could live

[LalaLatte]

I don't know your friend, so I don't know why she reacted that way, but she sounds jealous or at least taken aback by your lifestyle change. 

 

Anyway, ignore her comments and keep doing what's healthier and better for you. 

[noodlenoodle]

There's a chance she's just worried and didn't really phrase things well. She might not realize that your waist looks thinner because you've had a positive lifestyle change -- if someone in recovery from an ED looks like they've gotten skinnier, it's easy for others to become concerned that they're still trying to lose weight. Because EDs have physical effects, people often do shit like backward-diagnosing others ("she looks anorexic!") when it's not just the weight loss, it's the mental relationship with the weight loss as well. Likewise, someone appearing less skinny is associated with recovery when it's not necessarily like that. So if she appears to be reacting negatively to you looking thinner, it's possible she's just mixing up those things and doesn't realize that this is how recovery can look. Anyway, congratulations on getting stronger and feeling better! That's really great

[nootnoot]

She's jealous you're getting your shit together and looking like a snacc

No, you're not overreacting.

 

go back and get the crop top 

[SJJD]

Why should she drop the workout routine? Even if she is fit working out is really healthy no matter what weight you are 

Ignore your friend and continue living the healthy life style she wishes she could live

i think they're asking her to drop the workout routine here. like tell us what it is. 

[Suzy Quatro]

Maybe she doesn't believe your explanation, which wouldn't be that rare as people who don't work out don't really know is possible to gain some weight (muscle) and still look slim. So she could be thinking you're still throwing up and doing some crazy (and unhealthy) shit to look like that.

[cake mf]

What a hoe. I have you added on ig and sis you SLAY don’t let those salty bitches tell you anything differently <3

[katsu curry chips]

I get it tho. As someone with a history of eating disorder as well, if she’s your friend that trauma impacted her too. It’s exhausting watching someone you love destroy themselves, so maybe cut her some slack just this once and talk to her about it? She might be feeling responsible and extra cautious around you, sort of like a watchful kid always following their alcoholic parent’s movements. I’m not saying she was right to say what she said but it IS a precarious situation you’re both in. You’re both trying to adjust to you getting better, and she’s probably scared you’ll relapse. And you do still have a journey ahead of you, one that is gonna require a lot of honesty and patience from you and your loved ones. So my advice is to try to communicate with her before you jump to conclusions regarding her motives. Btw congratulations on getting better! ♡

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[tenxuxi]

Why should she drop the workout routine? Even if she is fit working out is really healthy no matter what weight you are 

Ignore your friend and continue living the healthy life style she wishes she could live

 

you misunderstood lol.. in the context i was using it 'drop' meant like share/release the workout routine.

[Poetry]

I don't know if you have a 6-pack or not, since you mentioned lines on your stomach and muscle definition. From an aesthetic stand point I personally don't like 6-packs paired with a crop top/skirt outfit.  A 6-pack looks nice and crop top with skirt can be cute, but together for me...no.

[sparkle dust]

you misunderstood lol.. in the context i was using it 'drop' meant like share/release the workout routine.

oh i see lmao ok i was like what is this contradictory statement 

[EasySteezy]

you misunderstood lol.. in the context i was using it 'drop' meant like share/release the workout routine.

message me! I have a workout playlist on youtube! My bf used to personal train people, so I have a little bit of an advantage, plus he has a home gym, I'd be more than willing to share though

[sublime]

message me! I have a workout playlist on youtube! My bf used to personal train people, so I have a little bit of an advantage, plus he has a home gym, I'd be more than willing to share though

 

drop it for me too sis i am interested

 

also congrats on getting healthier, it might be that your friend was phrasing it weirdly or maybe happened to misunderstood your explanation for some reason because i don't see why ~attack~ you now, from a stranger's perspective.

[roamingcat]

First of all, congratulations on ditching the dangerous habit of extreme dieting, it's so healthy and harmful to your body so I'm glad to hear you are living a healthy lifestyle now. Good for you!

 

As for your friend, maybe I'm not reading it correctly, but I didn't find anything overly offensive in what she said? It didn't sound like she was making a dig at your body, but more like she sounded disinterested, could be she's had a bad day so her response came off a bit b*tchy. If she's your BFF and has always been a great friend aside from this incident, I would give her the benefit of the doubt. She's you BFF, you know better than the rest of us what kind of person she really is.

[Ego ista]

I don't know your friend, so I don't know why she reacted that way, but she sounds jealous or at least taken aback by your lifestyle change. 

 

Anyway, ignore her comments and keep doing what's healthier and better for you.