Just to give you an idea of what I look like: I'm not ugly at all. In fact, I've been told that my face is pretty cute and handsome (not bragging at all. I just want to tell you the truth in order to explain my situatuon to you) and I often do pretty well on online dating sites until girls discover my height. My hair is blonde and I always have stupid Justin Bieberish haircut which I should change. My skin is quite pale and I have green eyes.
Here is the biggest problem about me: I'm only 163cm (5'4) and I look like a 14 year old. Not only because of my height, but the fact that my face also looks very young. It's almost unbelievable that I'm 18. I've never had a girlfriend before. I've only been on one date before, but it was with a crazy 24 year old girl that I met online who's into really short and young looking guys like me.
The first question I get from people when I'm at parties is "How old are you?" because I don't even look old enough to be there. This makes me feel really embarrassed and ashamed to attend parties or any "adults only" event because I get stared at and people wonder why I'm there. If I go to any "adults only" place, I'll be stared at or even kicked out. I feel like I'll never get much respect from anyone in society, or at least less respect than the average person. Even if they're aware of my age, they'll still subconsciously treat me as a child. I think it will be hard for me to get a job due to the fact that a company won't want someone who looks like a child to represent them.
Here's the next major problem: How the hell can I get a girlfriend? I'm not complaining to girls, I totally understand why they wouldn't want to date me because I also wouldn't want to date someone who looks 14. Even if a girl is attracted to me, she would probably not want to date me because it would make her look creepy. People would think 'Why the hell is she dating a young teenager?". It also basically destroys my chances of online dating. I could have a really great conversation with a girl but then she'll begin to stop caring about me after I tell her my height. If I didn't tell her my height, I would be very ashamed once I met her and very worried about her reaction.
The other problem that I have is this: How can I protect my girlfriend/wife if I find one? I'm the least intimidating person and I'm very small. Pretty much any guy could destroy me in a fight and if they were hurting my girlfriend/wife, I wouldn't be able to do anything no matter how hard I tried. What's the point of being in a relationship with me? It would be much better to have a boyfriend or husband who can actually protect you. Even if I became good at fighting, I would be screwed if some super tall guy started hurting me or my wife. If I was a girl, I wouldn't want to date someone like me.
Should I just give up and accept that I must live life alone? Should I die? I think it might actually be a very bad decision for me to fall in love with a girl, because I will be powerless to protect or defend her if something bad happens. It would also be borderline immoral for me to have children, because my genetics would risk them being born short and weak like me. I just don't understand why any girl would choose me over someone else. I'm basically inferior to the vast majority of men.