WestWorld 1,213 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 I came to realize that I do have feelings for a close friend of mine...although I’m happy for him, I can’t help but be jealous every time he talks about his gf lol I know I shouldn’t feel that way but it just hurts a lot. How can I deal with such a negative feeling? I want to support and be happy for him but is it selfish of me for not wanting to hear about his gf? I can’t control my feelings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faces 5,832 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 omg this happened to me. i felt bad for crushing on someone who was already taken, idk it felt like i was being disrespectful even though i didnt know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B612 22,399 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 I once liked a guy but was like uh "meh" when he got a gf I lose interest completely, it's no fun to like someone who is already taken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!SpammeR! 7,791 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 to me tbh it's a turn off when someone is already taken, i'm grateful for that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milkcafe 3,438 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 i've been in that same situation before. i've literally had to hear her tell me all about her sexcapades with this girl she was dating and some other dude she hooked up with after her. it sucks a lot. i don't have any advice because i'm pretty damn bad at handling it myself, but i wish you all the best. i know how much this can hurt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FAAJ 2,528 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 Ehhhhh actually I can handle it very well because all the boys I had crush on were taken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrayCray 2,636 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 I understand you op. You just gotta gradually let it go. I think of it as "it wasnt meant to be". It's better to stay friends than to lose that good friend by feeling jealous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaniPi 2,626 Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 Trust me on this. Forget about him. Don't even bother going there. Its way too painful, if the feelings are not the same from him, and he doesn't want to leave his girlfriend for you. Keep him as a friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yagura 12,799 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 Mess. I know he's your friend but maybe you should put some distance between you too. It will be impossible for you to lose feeling for him if you're constantly talking and interacting with that guy. Even more if he's always talking about his girlfriend, it will be difficult to hide the fact that you're jealous and hurt. You can't keep him as a friend as long as you have feelings for him. Do you think you could tell him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sana Minatozaki 3,305 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 they're gonna break up once and strike when the iron is hot (when they're in a fight) lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChungJoJo 31 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 find someone more attractive to crush on is probably the easiest way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sungjins 676 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 block him out of your life and just try your best to ignore him. it'll probably take time but you'll thank yourself in the long run Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pleasure 2,956 Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 they're gonna break up once and strike when the iron is hot (when they're in a fight) lol lmafao Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternal glow 6,196 Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 Like some people have mentioned, I automatically lose interest when I find out they are already in a relationship. I do think it's good to keep some distance at least until you have gotten over or settled your feelings for him. Otherwise, I feel like it's just going to keep getting worse and you end up being the one that gets hurt the most. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
layixings 100 Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 i lose my interest once i know he's taken tbh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyBee12 33 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 to me tbh it's a turn off when someone is already taken, i'm grateful for that I try to say to myself.. he is already taken.. just give up find someone more attractive to crush on is probably the easiest way. that's what I do... or say that there is someone more better than them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyBee12 33 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 Like some people have mentioned, I automatically lose interest when I find out they are already in a relationship. I do think it's good to keep some distance at least until you have gotten over or settled your feelings for him. Otherwise, I feel like it's just going to keep getting worse and you end up being the one that gets hurt the most. You and the guy can still be friends right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyBee12 33 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 they're gonna break up once and strike when the iron is hot (when they're in a fight) lol That's what happened to my friend's friend... The guy had a group or friends and when the couple broke up.. all the guy friends in the group was contacting the girl.. omg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternal glow 6,196 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 You and the guy can still be friends right? Yeah, of course. But I think it's better to give yourself time and space so that you've sorted your feelings out so it doesn't get messy. But for sure you can still be friends afterwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyBee12 33 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 Yeah, of course. But I think it's better to give yourself time and space so that you've sorted your feelings out so it doesn't get messy. But for sure you can still be friends afterwards. thanks ... because my friend doesn't contact her guy friend anymore.. because he is in a relationship with another girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternal glow 6,196 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 thanks ... because my friend doesn't contact her guy friend anymore.. because he is in a relationship with another girl Yeah, I mean depending on the situation that can happen sometimes. Like sometimes, if they're unable to settle their feelings for the person, it's hard to stay friends because they need to know where to draw the line. It's might be too painful for your friend as well or they might not be confident enough with controlling their feelings. So whether they stay friends or not really depends on the person and how they've dealt with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mitsuhoney 1,231 Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 I have been asking myself this all the time. My crush and I are quite close and he knows how I feel about him and I know how he feels about me, but he is committed to his current partner (which he has even admitted to me is barely even working out because the intimacy between them has been long lost) and everyone of our friends has said how they notice how our faces light up whenever the other walks into the room, how we constantly make each other feel and how sweet we are to the other and it makes a lot of them sad that we aren't together. If I were you in your predicament, I would try to find a way to nicely tell him to stop talking about his girlfriend to you, I know there is a way to say it where it isn't obvious as to why, but it just really depends on how the relationship between the two of you is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyBee12 33 Posted October 16, 2017 Share Posted October 16, 2017 Yeah, I mean depending on the situation that can happen sometimes. Like sometimes, if they're unable to settle their feelings for the person, it's hard to stay friends because they need to know where to draw the line. It's might be too painful for your friend as well or they might not be confident enough with controlling their feelings. So whether they stay friends or not really depends on the person and how they've dealt with it. I agree...and eventhough your mind wants to keep the distance, your heart might not want to Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzy Quatro 1,441 Posted October 16, 2017 Share Posted October 16, 2017 I think the biggest issue is that he's a close friend of yours, that kind of makes it worse and more complicated. If that wasn't the case you wouldn't have to pretend to support his relation as a good friend should, it makes it more awkward the whole situation and while I haven't been in that situation I think I would distance myself from that person in order to cut that bs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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