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Being social is so fucking hard.


miyoo

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Are you guys socially inept, exceptional, or some area in between?

 

 

For University students, was frosh 'the time of your life' or did you hate it? 

 

 

I've been at Frosh for 4 days and I decided to stay home and skip the whole fifth day completely (even though I paid for it). I'm generally not too bad socially, I can keep up conversations and laugh at bad jokes. But these past few days I've been fucking struggling. Something about introducing yourself 50 times in an hour and asking the same questions to 100 people is just exhausting and makes me want to cry. I don't think I've ever participated in such an exhausting event before. 

 

I thought I could show up and have fun but I have never wanted to just crawl up into a hole and hibernate so badly. Do you guys have any advice so that I can have more fun for the next couple days of frosh? 

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I'm an idept but I know how to fake it lmao, today was the first day of the semester and I had to ask everyone about their summer when I didn't care and came home exhausted from doing small talk.

 

When I was a frosh I kinda got stuck on the first day with people I didn't like, I ended up as friends with a few people that are really nice but it was a whole month after classes started, until then I was really downhearted. I also don't want to go to Erasmus because i'm afraid of having to socialize.

 

ohdearplz.png

 

So yeah I really have no advice because I'm a mess, but try to find good friends!

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Yes omg, I went to a new school this year and istg I haven't talked to any kids in my class yet unsure.png I mean i'm pretty ok in like...answering and stuff but I really can't start a conversation. I want to be friends with the girls in my class bc they seem funny and nice, but it's pretty hard right now...

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I don't find socializing in Asia hard because they're more conserative. I do find it problematic here in the UK where everyone loves going to the pub to hook up with random ppl you don't give a shit about and forced to talk about your personal life to these strangers you don't really wish to share with.

y9I4jFK.gif

 

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honestly it mostly depends on my mood - I can go from "I hate people" to "wow I love ppl" within like 10 minutes

but socialising is actually energy-consuming sometimes, like keeping up* with conversations and entertaining the people you're with can be exhausting, I can relate 

 

Frosh is temporary so it'll be over soon laugh.png my Freshers wasn't too bad; I was pretty gassed coming into uni so I was prepared to see a lot of people. but being around people a lot naturally makes you more sociable so I guess carrying on and sticking it out might work? but if it doesn't then honestly don't force it tbh, at the end of the day you're not paying thousands annually* to make friends, you're there to get a degree laugh.pngalthough coursemates are essential so you can always get their work if you're stuck

 

I can't spell

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I don't have problems with interacting with others at all. I think it's due to having a big ass family, and my parents having me do a lot of things on my own at a really young age. They taught me to be more independent, so I guess I'm exceptional. When it comes to romantic relationships, though... that's whole other ball park. If I like someone, I don't know what to say. It's like I go blank and mute. 

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I'm and idept but I know how to fake it lmao, today was the first day of the semester and I had to ask everyone about their summer when I didn't care and came home exhausted from doing small talk.

 

When I was a frosh I kinda got stuck on the first day with people I didn't like, I ended up as friends with a few people that are really nice but it was a whole month after classes started, until then I was really downhearted. I also don't want to go to Erasmus because i'm afraid of having to socialize.

 

ohdearplz.png

 

So yeah I really have no advice because I'm a mess, but try to find good friends!

 

Making small talk and trying to listen to things you really don't care about is the worst but unfortunately, that's exactly what you have to do. I found a couple friends but even with them, it's awkward. I hope it gets better as the school year actually starts but these past couple days have been the longest of my life. 

 

 

oh god i hated the first days of college last year,i was being so nice to everyone for 2 weeks straight then i fucking gave up lmao 0u0plz.png its so tiring 

 
lmaaaoo, ikr. Like I want to 'be myself' but that would mean telling slightly offensive jokes and not being worried that others will think I'm mean or insensitive to actual issues. I want to be nice and fit in but it takes so much self control. 
 
 

Ah! When I was in college I used to want friends, and was super social. But it wasn't me and it was exhausting. But now that I am out of college all I want to do is watch anime after work or read a book. My point is do you and no need to conform to social norms.

 
Yessss, I definitely agree that not everyone has to be social to be successful in life. Thank you for reminding me of that <3
 
 

honestly it mostly depends on my mood - I can go from "I hate people" to "wow I love ppl" within like 10 minutes

but socialising is actually energy-consuming sometimes, like keeping up* with conversations and entertaining the people you're with can be exhausting, I can relate 

 

Frosh is temporary so it'll be over soon laugh.png my Freshers wasn't too bad; I was pretty gassed coming into uni so I was prepared to see a lot of people. but being around people a lot naturally makes you more sociable so I guess carrying on and sticking it out might work? but if it doesn't then honestly don't force it tbh, at the end of the day you're not paying thousands annually* to make friends, you're there to get a degree laugh.pngalthough coursemates are essential so you can always get their work if you're stuck

 

I can't spell

 
Yeah, I agree that it depends on mood but for the most part, even in a good mood I find socializing exhausting. For sure, in the end, I'm there to learn and having friends is just a small non mandatory part of it. I think that naturally friends will come when you have to suffer through school work together so I hope that will help. Thank you for the advice :) 
 

I don't have problems with interacting with others at all. I think it's due to having a big ass family, and my parents having me do a lot of things on my own at a really young age. They taught me to be more independent, so I guess I'm exceptional. When it comes to romantic relationships, though... that's whole other ball park. If I like someone, I don't know what to say. It's like I go blank and mute. 

 
I've always admired the skill to just be naturally able to talk to people and actually enjoy it. I think that bc of where I grew up (everyone is in small suburban families and kids just found cliques quickly and stuck with them throughout school), everyone here is a bit more reserved. Romantic relationships are just a whole other story, lol. Haven't gotten to that chapter of my life yet. 
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I'm the same way. ohdearplz.png

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Making small talk and trying to listen to things you really don't care about is the worst but unfortunately, that's exactly what you have to do. I found a couple friends but even with them, it's awkward. I hope it gets better as the school year actually starts but these past couple days have been the longest of my life. 

 

 

 
lmaaaoo, ikr. Like I want to 'be myself' but that would mean telling slightly offensive jokes and not being worried that others will think I'm mean or insensitive to actual issues. I want to be nice and fit in but it takes so much self control. 
 
 
 
Yessss, I definitely agree that not everyone has to be social to be successful in life. Thank you for reminding me of that <3
 
 
 
Yeah, I agree that it depends on mood but for the most part, even in a good mood I find socializing exhausting. For sure, in the end, I'm there to learn and having friends is just a small non mandatory part of it. I think that naturally friends will come when you have to suffer through school work together so I hope that will help. Thank you for the advice smile.png
 
 
I've always admired the skill to just be naturally able to talk to people and actually enjoy it. I think that bc of where I grew up (everyone is in small suburban families and kids just found cliques quickly and stuck with them throughout school), everyone here is a bit more reserved. Romantic relationships are just a whole other story, lol. Haven't gotten to that chapter of my life yet. 

 

 

yess being nice to everyone and TALKING with everyone even people you dont actually like,drains you out man rlytearpls.png

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I'm a pretty quiet person so most people don't approach me already, and I'm not v sociable as well so I totally understand your pain rlytearpls.png The worst thing about orientation is having to be ENTHUSIASTIC!!!!!!! all the time like I get tired after maybe 15 minutes of cheering lmao 

 

During my freshman camp, my group leaders were also hell bent on making us stay up late to talk as well and I just wanted to sleep and have some alone time lol. I actually just straight off fell asleep once while my friend was talking laugh.png

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I'm a pretty quiet person so most people don't approach me already, and I'm not v sociable as well so I totally understand your pain rlytearpls.png The worst thing about orientation is having to be ENTHUSIASTIC!!!!!!! all the time like I get tired after maybe 15 minutes of cheering lmao 

 

During my freshman camp, my group leaders were also hell bent on making us stay up late to talk as well and I just wanted to sleep and have some alone time lol. I actually just straight off fell asleep once while my friend was talking laugh.png

 

Yeah same when I'm not talking, I naturally look pissed off so people don't approach me often xD OMG FUCK tHE CHEERS. Legit everyone is always dancing and laughing, doing cheers and it's so tiring. 

 

also, kang daniel is so cute

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I don't like being social. I don't like hanging out with people too much and I don't know if this makes me weird but I like being alone.

 

I like having my own space and when in forced to go to social gatherings or to talk to people I don't know I'm miserable. I get awkward and shy and it's just a mess.

 

See You Space Cowboy...

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I hate social gatherings and pretending random people asking about my personal life is perfectly fine wthplz.png

Me too. The reason why I hate socializing is because it's almost a requirement to share your personal life no matter how boring it is.

My life is not interesting enough to narrate it to someone. Let's talk about flying penguins instead.

 

 

It's actually harder for girls. We have to pretend we're friendly to cope up with the social role.

Social environment can also be dreading for antisocial boys but they can just slump in a corner of a classroom and play PSP and no one would bat an eye. Somehow, girls (or maybe just I) can't find the social courage to do that without worrying that my classmates would think that I hate them.

My classmates don't care if boys do that because it's normally seen in boys. Some even find it attractive.

 

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I'm super introverted, approaching and talking to people give me anxiety I was miserable the first few weeks of frosh. After I introduce myself I can't keep the conversation going to I was silent most of the time haha. Luckily a girl approached me and we found out we live in the same area and conversation was easy from then ;v; I stuck to her and her friends and made friends with the people in her cirlcle. But in classes without her I was on my own haha at those classes I knew like max. 5 people and only because we were grouped together for an assignment or we were seatmates at one point lmao

 

(So yeah maybe find at least one person you're comfortable with and leech off their friend circle hahah)

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