Jump to content
OneHallyu Will Be Closing End Of 2023 ×
OneHallyu

How do you deal with bullies?


CrayCray

Recommended Posts

My sister's boyfriend's younger brother gets bullied a lot at school. When his parents ask why he gets bullied, it's

 

hard for him to explain or come up with a reason because duh, it's bullying! It's sad because when he can't answer them,

 

all he could do is start crying warstarplz.png Also, because his parents don't speak much English and come from a very traditional

 

background, all they do is ask "What did you do to make them bully you?". His teachers are of no help either because

 

telling the bullies "You need to stop" will not prevent them from picking on him after/outside of school grounds souleyesplz.png

 

I'm pretty sure transferring is out of the question because he comes from a big family with about eight kids. These kind of

 

Asian parents are those that will in a way let their kids suck it up until graduation or worse, ending up harming

 

themselves. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ignore

Link to comment
Share on other sites

In my entire life from childhood to adulthood, I've only ever gotten bullied by the one group of people who you can never get rid of no matter what. I learned to grow a thicker layer of skin and ignore them. For my particular situation, since I can never get rid of them, I just have to be patient and love myself even more

Link to comment
Share on other sites

moving school is always a good option i used to have bullies but then i moved cities and it was fine

 

but thats usually not an option so tbh i would find someone older and stronger who i trust and let them protect me from the bullies 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I got bullied in 5th grade when I used to be "friends" with a group of girls. I think I may have said something that offended this one girl who had really a dominant personality and after that she would get our group of friends to prank me or get me in trouble. I was still super nice to them cause I wanted friends, but I wasn't close to the main girl that caused the bullying since I'm pretty sure she didn't like me at the time. Once, we had to get to school really early, and her and I were the only ones from our group there so we decided to hang out. We realized that we're actually both pretty chill and she even told me that she was gonna me nice to me from there on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Asian parents are sometimes too harsh and unreasonable :( 


ur sig and dp of V is everything. Fk hes hot

I got bullied in 5th grade when I used to be "friends" with a group of girls. I think I may have said something that offended this one girl who had really a dominant personality and after that she would get our group of friends to prank me or get me in trouble. I was still super nice to them cause I wanted friends, but I wasn't close to the main girl that caused the bullying since I'm pretty sure she didn't like me at the time. Once, we had to get to school really early, and her and I were the only ones from our group there so we decided to hang out. We realized that we're actually both pretty chill and she even told me that she was gonna me nice to me from there on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I understand what u saying about most Asian parents.

They gonna be like "just endure it" or thinking every kids has to go through this stage anyway.

So yes, they won't transferred their school for that.

With them not speaking English, they aren't able to talk to principle about the problem that actually can help in the future if there is physical abused occur (get the bully expelled). Cuz that is something I would suggest personally, get the parents talk to principle about it (as a warning), and if there is evident of physical abused, you can get them expelled and no longer seeing them. The thing is Asian parents tended to intimidate with authority (cuz authority in Asian countries are very harsh and abusive with their power. There is no such thing as parents daring to complaint to the teacher about issues and neither a chance meeting the principle). Therefore, even if they speaks decent English, they would avoids as much as they can cuz it's "too much" for them as they are first generation migration (so the power stuck in their brain). If the parents willingly to do it that will be great, maybe has him to translate for them to the principle.

 

If they won't do that, I guess trying to hangout around the crowed during break, and sneaking went home after school.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How old is that boy? I'm sure he's not seeking to get bullied but when someone asks you what have you done is for trying to get some context and have a better understanding of the situation, it might not be phrased in the most sensible and emphatic manner but I also wouldn't be able to advice or help someone if the only information I've got is "I'm being bullied" and hear someone crying.

 

Trough my school life I've witnessed various forms of bullying for a variety of reasons and some of them I think could be avoided where in other cases there's no form to prevent it without intervention of school authorities. It also depends on how they're bullying him, but if it's something very bad or unavoidable he needs to get transferred to a different school.

 

From my experience the only general advice I could give to someone would be to never cry infront of your classmates and bullies. If you show or display in any form what they're doing to you is making you upset or mad, then it's only going to get worst; for bullies is the equivalent of a shark smelling blood. So even if you feel very sad, pissed or whatever you just have to hold on the tears and pretend like it doesn't affect you. People would harass me, pick on me or even threaten me in school but I acted like I didn't give a fuck, even if I was scared to death on the inside, and while you can't avoid problems or confrontations all the time at least this way you won't be perceived as someone weak and they would just move on and pick on someone else that isn't you. It also helps to have friends, be supportive with each other and you have to rat out the bullies all the time, even if they threaten you just gotta rat them out if they're messing with you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Honestly, I think ignoring is actually not the best option. Some bullies are not that stupid, that they don't know that method already. They actually try harder, and truthfully you lose a lot of confidence in the end, because sadly bullying does not stop at school. In the workplace, that type of behaviour would be unacceptable, and should not be tolerated. In my opinion, being more direct, without getting upset is better, and also not showing a weak reaction, if they still don't understand just cut them out completely. If it gets too extreme that you cannot deal with it, you need to tell someone. Don't suffer in silence. Also having friends with you also helps.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I reccomend that he talks to his guidance couselor. They know how to handle the situation and can probably get him to switch classes if its that big of an issue. He could also go to an assistant principal they'll deal with the bully by giving him a warning and possibly suspension. Talking to the teachers usually do nothing bc they can only tell them to stop and some just dont care enough to deal with the issue.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sorry for my horrible English and this is just my honest opinion but well, no matter where you go there will always be bullies, dicks, jerks or whatever it is. What you need to do is just to deal with it and thicken your skin.

 

Add: for some cases it can be like eat or being eaten.

 

I agree with killing them tho -_-

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Killing them is an option, but it's an unhealthy one. Not recommmended. And I suggest you should listen to the person that said for him to not look weak to others. Also, since he's not able to verbally communicate with his parents how about he writes down/types down his feelings instead in a letter and gives it to his parents? If that's an option of course.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ah this breaks my heart. I was bullied too and the only thing I could do was ignore them. I eventually made some friends and the bullying stopped because we all got older and wiser. Just tell him that its not always going to be like this. It will get better.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

well i was once bullied when i was in middle school

and cried openly in the school while being bullied(unintentionally, just because my mental wasn't that big)

continue for awhile

then i just started to talk to them 

not confronting but just daily talk as if we were friends

and start doing things like play sport with them

and suddenly it's stop

 

and when those bullies try to bullied another kid

i just asked them not to and i befriend with that kid

and they ended up befriend with that kid too

 

i'm not saying it will work for your sister's boyfriend

but mostly what makes bully keep bullying someone is because the one they bullied are act helpless

it's hard to fight back for some people

but it's not that hard to forgive them and try to get close without feeling small

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Find some friends that will back him up. Also, record what they do if you can. That way you'll have evidence that can be shown to your parents. Bullies are cowards deep down. If they know they can't attack him in any way they'll back off. I'd have suggested verbally fighting back you know but since you said he can't express himself in English that might not work.

 

There's 8 kids too so maybe you guys can look out for him.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.

Back to Top