Jennifer 883 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 i usually don't self-diagnose myself, but i've kind of been in a slump nowadays. ive been crying sometimes, a lot of times i feel like a disappointment to my family and just cry about that. all they do is compare me to other kids and how they already know what they want to be and when i tell them i'm interested in physical therapy and i want to volunteer at a physical therapy office during the summer, it's like they're scoffing at me especially my mom. they're like isn't it just being a chiropractor and they don't take it as a legitimate job. they say they want me to be anything i want to as long as i know i'll work hard for it, but everything they discuss about things like this to me, it just seems like they're shaming me. my cousin literally wants to be an orthodontist because he doesn't like his teeth and my parents support that while they don't support me taking an interest in physical therapy. they said i shouldn't base a job in the interest, which i agree with. but i also said i wanted to try it out by volunteering in the summer (to see if i might consider it as a job) and the only reason i said that was bc they asked me what i wanted to in the future. what am i supposed to say?? it's not like they're any less disappointed than they are. i know they love me but when i hear them chastising me and comparing me, i hate it and i hate myself. they make me feel like im a disappointment like they wish they had another kid. and for the past year or two, i haven't hung out with a friend after school at all. i used to consistently hang out with my friend during freshman year, and now... no one. im always at home. i don't really have a choice since i have to take care of my siblings (they 10 or so years younger than me) and im okay with it but it's weird. i feel lonely but i don't feel lonely. when i do hang out with friends, i just wish i could go home or am bored but a lot of times i feel so lonely i wish i had enough friends to relate to. every conversation i seem to have just seems like a surface. i don't talk about myself to others and i let them talk. my mood is a constant MEH everyday, feeling happy is every once in a while. even interests like makeup faded as soon as junior year hit. i used to obsess over makeup and do my makeup every friday now i just can't be bothered. also, ive been gaining a lot of weight from stress eating and ive consistently only been getting 5 hours of sleep for the past semester. my parents have definitely noticed and have been calling me fat for the whole year and i want to do something about my weight but i just can't be bothered. my parents call me lazy and i feel laziness too, but at the same time, i think it's more than that because my will to do anything other than isolate myself has worsened. am i depressed? should i contact someone for help? i don't know what to do my life just feels meh. im not suicidal or anything just feel meh. does anyone feel the same? thanks (sorry for making such a heavy topic + making it long as fuck ive just been feeling sad a lot) edit: i would ask my counselor but she's a literal bitch. i asked her about taking online classes (it's free if you ask your counselor) and she stared at me for a good 10 seconds as if i just slapped her in the face. i'd rather not go to her of all people... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cornangel 5,295 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 you're depressed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jessica's G-string 3,589 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 go to a professional and dont listen to what google or OH users tell you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seokminhee 347 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 You do display symptoms of depression that I have experienced myself. Rather than gaining weight, I lost weight from not eating enough. I still find it hard to eat a lot tbh. Even if you're not feeling suicidal, please seek help. I have never attempted to kill myself, but I have always asked myself whether my family and friends would care if I died/disappeared. This is just a silly question my depression puts into my head, but it happens rarely nowadays. I have gotten help, but I still feel shitty. I don't like to say this but: once you have depression, it's hard to get rid of it. You can't get rid of it completely. It's like a volcano, really. Depression is a bitch, and I hate having it - but I have it: and I have to accept that. And so should you. Just get diagnosed by a medical person. They know what they're on about, after all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NSFL 821 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 I don't want to freak you out or anything but I was in exactly the same state you were in in the past, and I didn't seek help because I thought it may just go away but it just got worse and worse. I got to a very dark place in my life. That's when I went to a therapist and got onto the road to recovery, but I never would have fallen so deeply into that hole if I had gotten help earlier, so it's definitely best to go to a professional as soon as you can. And please don't ever think that you are lazy, because you're not. You seem like a very bright kid, don't listen to your parent's expectations for jobs are and do what feels right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seokminhee 347 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 You seem like a very bright kid, don't listen to your parent's expectations for jobs are and do what feels right. Preach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanan 4,318 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 The best advice you can take is to a professional/your school's therapist if they have one available. I felt the same way you did my sophomore year of college...the lack of motivation, the loss of interest in hobbies...its scary as hell. Remember that at the end of the day, you should always do what is best for you. It's okay to be a little selfish when it comes to your own mental health and wellbeing. Your parents seem to be speaking from a place of concern but maybe they don't know how to tell you they're worried? That aside, I would say go with the physical therapy internship so you get a chance to see if you're taking the right path. Explain to them that you're looking into career options and this is one thst greatly appeals to you and you want to go forward with it. They'll naysay as much as they want to, but in the end they just want you to succeed. Parents are bizarre and always say weird things they either don't mean or the right things the wrong way. I'm 23 and I still don't understand mine. Maybe, if you can, talk to them about how what they say makes you feel. Tell them that it hurts your feelings or makes you feel bad when they say what they say. I know it sounds crazy, but sometimes saying "This hurt my feelings" helps. Sometimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frogurt 7,163 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 A professional diagnosis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mon chan 4,645 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 I feel exactly like u (except I don't gain weight, I lose appetite)... I don't know what to do and everytime when I talk to my family I feel "mentally abused" by their requirements on me and they got no understanding or empathy about how I feel. At least I feel better when I talk to a few of my friends. I just wanna escape to my home country as I hate where I'm living now sooo much (I'm studying abroad now). But I'm in tuition fee debt and it's harder to pay off if I work in my home country. I'm very confused. am i depressed? should i contact someone for help? i don't know what to do my life just feels meh. im not suicidal or anything just feel meh. Yep, exactly, I barely feel "happy". My normal mood is -10. Btw do u have anyone to talk to. I feel better talking to my friend back there. Otherwise better seek mental help from counsellor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iamayam 1,081 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 I think you're depressed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VANTE 4,595 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 even if you're not like "officially depressed," seeing a counselor or a psychologist honestly helps a lot. i saw a psychologist this semester and it did help me get through some of my issues and it also helped me realize that i'm stronger than i think i think seeing a mental health professional should be like seeing a dentist; everyone should have to get a check up every once in a while Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ploopy678 874 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 I dont think self diagnosing is a good idea. Maybe you should go speak to your school counsellor! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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