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I need advice: a stranger asked me out for coffee


Chouette

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So I was waiting for the bus and a woman came up to ask about the bus schedule. The guy standing behind me in line and I both responded to her and afterwards he started a conversation with me. He said I looked "interesting" and "cute", and began asking me some personal questions + saying a few things about himself too. When we got on the bus, he asked me out for coffee sometimes, saying I could say no if I thought he was a creep. I was feeling adventurous a bit (lmao) and said "sure thing, why not?" even though I usually wouldn't. He asked for my Facebook too.

 

I'm not super interested in him but it might be nice to get to know him more. The thing he said about me being cute was quite flattering (not sure about the "interesting" part) and I honestly just thought he wouldn't be a creep if he actually gave me a way out ("you can say no if you don't want to").

 

Now, I know I said yes to the coffee date but what would you guys do if this happened to you? I want to know so I can appropriately adjust my behaviors next time when I see him.

 

Any response is appreciated.

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dude, no, you know nothing about this dude

 

Well he talked about himself and I have his Facebook. But it's true that this seems super fishy. Thanks for the advice :)

 

This happened to me.  He wanted to sleep with me after, I was grossed out. Don't do it OP.

 

Care to elaborate? And I'm sorry that you experienced that. Was it for coffee too or did you actually go out (for dinners, to a bar, etc.)?

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if your feeling super uncomfortable then don't do it but if you want to try and then i say go for, tell him you want to pick the location and time ( somewhere very visible and when it's a nice amount of people around ), try going on a few outings like those while you get to know him. if he's a creep then don't talk to him anymore, and if you have his facebook info you can find out more about him etc. 

 

you never know, just if you think he's okay, try going out for coffee one time but if you're really feeling like this isn't a good idea tell him you don't feel comfortable and maybe ya'll can text or message each other for a while

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As a man i can tell, just text with him a bit and get to know him abit. After you feel comfortable maybe have a rl talk with him. If you notice he just wants to just sleep with you.. then it's your choice, but yeah...

 

Just say you would like to text with him and so on first. If you feel he doesn't pay you attention or makes some dirty jokes here and there, you know he just wants to sleep with you.

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Care to elaborate? And I'm sorry that you experienced that. Was it for coffee too or did you actually go out (for dinners, to a bar, etc.)?

Coffee.

I was at the mall, studying and doing my own thing. A guy came up and he said that I was cute and started talking to me. After 2 or so hours, he asked if we wanted to get coffee. I agreed.

We went to the coffee station next to the mall, and it was late. I didn't have a car because I walked to the mall. He said that he would take me home. But in the car back to my home, he started getting creepy. It was seriously the first day we met, and he was implying that he wanted to go to my house to sleep with me. He got my number too beforehand. I firmly laughed and turned it into a joke. The mall wasn't so far from my house so we got to the street my house was pretty soon. I refused to give him my real adress. Needless to say as soon as I got home, I blocked his number locked the door, and had a knife near my bed just in case..

 

Edit-clarity

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If you are feeling a bit adventurous, why not?

The most important thing is to stay SAFE.

Not everyone is a creep and some time you just see cute strangers out and about and there is nothing wrong with wanting to know them a bit more if you are interested in them. Many wish they had the balls/(tits) to do that..haha.

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if your feeling super uncomfortable then don't do it but if you want to try and then i say go for, tell him you want to pick the location and time ( somewhere very visible and when it's a nice amount of people around ), try going on a few outings like those while you get to know him. if he's a creep then don't talk to him anymore, and if you have his facebook info you can find out more about him etc. 

 

you never know, just if you think he's okay, try going out for coffee one time but if you're really feeling like this isn't a good idea tell him you don't feel comfortable and maybe ya'll can text or message each other for a while

 

Some stalking beforehand always helps lol, thanks for the input!

 

This happened to me and my god do I wish I would've said no

 

Was it a really unfortunate experience? So far the two people who have experienced this have advised against going out so I guess it does say something about the situation. Thanks for commenting :)

 

As a man i can tell, just text with him a bit and get to know him abit. After you feel comfortable maybe have a rl talk with him. If you notice he just wants to just sleep with you.. then it's your choice, but yeah...

 

Just say you would like to text with him and so on first. If you feel he doesn't pay you attention or makes some dirty jokes here and there, you know he just wants to sleep with you.

 

Thanks for the advice. I love your dp btw ahmagahplz.png

 

I would firmly refuse.

 

Gotcha. Thanks for commenting!

 

If you want to know more about him I'd say give him a chance. He was polite and he didn't say anything inappropriate. Idk tho.

 

 

 

 

13bf188ba55fd2fea2bdc39a28d05e64_idk-tho

 

 

 

 

That meme is life. And thanks for commenting!

 

If you are feeling a bit adventurous, why not?

The most important thing is to stay SAFE.

Not everyone is a creep and some time you just see cute strangers out and about and there is nothing wrong with wanting to know them a bit more if you are interested in them. Many wish they had the balls/(tits) to do that..haha.

 

I'll definitely make sure the time and location are perfectly safe. It might eventually not work out though because I'm not too much into people who base judgments on looks (if the only reason he asked me out was that I looked "cute"). Thanks for the input!

 

do your research and try to find out if he is a rapist, killer or pedophile................. you never know amgplz.png

 

Lol, true!

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Coffee.

I was at the mall, studying and doing my own thing. A guy came up and he said that I was cute and started talking to me. After 2 or so hours, he asked if we wanted to get coffee. I agreed.

We went to the coffee station next to the mall, and it was late. I didn't have a car because I walked to the mall. He said that he would take me home. But in the car back to my home, he started getting creepy. It was seriously the first day we met, and he was implying that he wanted to go to my house to sleep with me. He got my number too beforehand. I firmly laughed and turned it into a joke. The mall wasn't so far from my house so we got to the street my house was pretty soon. I refused to give him my real adress. Needless to say as soon as I got home, I blocked his number locked the door, and had a knife near my bed just in case..

 

Edit-clarity

 

Ew, that's gross. I'm glad you got yourself out of that situation. Will keep your unfortunate experience in mind when I respond to this guy next time. Thanks for sharing rlytearpls.png

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Was it a really unfortunate experience? So far the two people who have experienced this have advised against going out so I guess it does say something about the situation. Thanks for commenting smile.png

 

Edit: Oh my god I had no idea this was going to be this long I apologize

 

Yep, it was. agreed to meet at cafe so I assumed we were going to have a drink there, but apparently what he had in mind was going to some park near his house and because my ass is too scared to say no I got onto the back of his bike I let him take me there. That's my first piece of advice; do not let him take you anywhere away from the place you agreed to meet. After we arrived he invited me into his house to get something to drink, and thank God I refused (even though it came out like awkward mumbling) because who knows what could have happened there. Please don't ever do that!A

After that he got some lemonade for me and we went to the park. It was incredibly awkward, I already felt so uncomfortable and to top it all off he tried to kiss me three times (I was like hell naw). After 15 minutes or so I told him I had somewhere to be (which wasn't even a lie) and left.

 

And the craziest part? A little over a month later, he approached one of my best friends in the exact same way and at the same place. We were both alone. And that wasn't a place either of us go to that often. The odds are insane; it must have been a regular thing for him to ask young girls out that way (it's worth noting that we were both 17 and he was 20, and he'd told me I looked younger). Thats fucking creepy.

 

Sorry if that was TLDR!  Long story short, be safe. Don't do anything you don't feel comfortable with and don't be afraid to say no. But every situation is different, just because this guy turned out to be a creep doesn't mean the guy you met will be. Just be safe is all!

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I always end up not giving a reply like I smile foolishly and pretend I don't understand them. Even if it's someone I like! A guy once said "you're very pretty I want to get to know you more" but I started feeling insecure. He was handsome. I started thinking "what if he realizes I'm not as pretty as he thinks?" "What if..." endless what ifs so I just ignored him 100% even tho i liked him a little. We spoke a bit and he seemed pleasant.

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