ournewboyfriend 1,549 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 How do you break up with friends? Well there's this couple, they're together since a year or something. I know them for a few years, and both of them have made it very clear that they consider me as their best friend I don't care about them much, but they are super clingy to me. Not sure how they came to the assumption that I'm their closest friend, I think I've made it pretty clear I treat them like I'd treat any other friend. Maybe it's because we've known each other for so much time but really I don't treat them in a special way like I would for people I actually care about more But idk, I don't really want to spend a good amount of time of my week w them and they keep trying to make plans and I keep saying no and it goes on. They're being super clingy and it's getting annoying but I really don't want to be rude because I know these people since the past 4-5 years and we have a lot of mutual friends it'd be weird and awkward if something went wrong. I thought of asking this here since if I asked anyone irl they'd know who I'm talking about and I'm not here for that I don't want to be a jerk about it but I really want space and I want to make it clear that we're not best friends or whatever. They are so clingy and I dont feel close with them and if I don't talk to them properly (I can be a lousy texter) then they get upset and stuff and idk it's just messy. I just want space and not feel obliged to talk to them everyday etc. I'm beginning to feel uncomfortable. If it was someone I really liked spending time with I'd be okay with them but I've made it pretty clear for this couple. I don't really start conversation w them anymore nor do I try to make effort to spend time w them but they keep pushing it which is uncomfortable. They're not bad but I really just need space. It's awkward Do I gradually start keeping distance? Do I tell them something, if yes what should I even say in a situation like this? Thanks tl;dr a clingy couple thinks I'm their best friend and I need space Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tez 280 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Just ignore all their texts and try to avoid them irl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vocalmonster 3,603 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Distance yourself from them and slowly ye will start to drift apart Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpinkinyourarea 306 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Just ignore all their texts and try to avoid them irl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ournewboyfriend 1,549 Posted October 17, 2016 Author Share Posted October 17, 2016 Just ignore all their texts and try to avoid them irl I do! I reply back after days sometimes and then they throw a fit and get upset, which makes me feel really bad. They're not bad people but I'm really not as close w them as they think I am They have 1-2 classes w me so it's not easy to just avoid them either Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tez 280 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 I do! I reply back after days sometimes and then they throw a fit and get upset, which makes me feel really bad. They're not bad people but I'm really not as close w them as they think I am They have 1-2 classes w me so it's not easy to just avoid them either Just don't respond at all and then they'll never be able to complain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lee Bye 154 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Do that thing where you ghost out their lives. Don't reply at all. Don't sit with them in class. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liberation 210 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 You can try ghosting them or......... Just be honest with how you feel and tell them you need some time off from them. If they're really your friend they'll understand. It's not really *that* difficult. Most things like these fail because of communication issues. If they can't understand your body language, then tell 'em, boo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ournewboyfriend 1,549 Posted October 17, 2016 Author Share Posted October 17, 2016 You can try ghosting them or......... Just be honest with how you feel and tell them you need some time off from them. If they're really your friend they'll understand. It's not really *that* difficult. Most things like these fail because of communication issues. If they can't understand your body language, then tell 'em, boo! I do subtly bring it up, but they're really clingy and it doesn't just work Maybe i'll straight up say it, I don't know. I don't want to make them feel upset Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Septiplier 501 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Would it be possible to be honest with them? I had the same problem with a former friend in middle school I just stopped responding to her texts and phone calls. It sucked but I was getting extremely unconfortable Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yunhae_yunhae 792 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Be a moderate texter, so don't reply days late but like reply like half a day later, e.g they texted you at midday so reply after 8pm really normally like nothings up, and if that midday text was 'lets hang out' then be like 'sorry i was busy' followed by whatever As for in school just try and hang out with other people? And cut down your time with them. So like if they're unavoidable during class still sit with them but then after class be like 'okay im off to go hang with --- see ya tomorrow!' There's no need to be mean or totally shut them out cos that's how things get messy, but if you just distance yourself whilst still acting 'normal'/ happy they'll just slowly stop trying so hard My source: I have a friend who used to always call me wanting to hang out and the only way to avoid it was to just reply late, cos picking up the phone = he's coming to hang out with me within the next hour Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ournewboyfriend 1,549 Posted October 17, 2016 Author Share Posted October 17, 2016 Be a moderate texter, so don't reply days late but like reply like half a day later, e.g they texted you at midday so reply after 8pm really normally like nothings up, and if that midday text was 'lets hang out' then be like 'sorry i was busy' followed by whatever As for in school just try and hang out with other people? And cut down your time with them. So like if they're unavoidable during class still sit with them but then after class be like 'okay im off to go hang with --- see ya tomorrow!' There's no need to be mean or totally shut them out cos that's how things get messy, but if you just distance yourself whilst still acting 'normal'/ happy they'll just slowly stop trying so hard My source: I have a friend who used to always call me wanting to hang out and the only way to avoid it was to just reply late, cos picking up the phone = he's coming to hang out with me within the next hour Thanks. I generally do avoid them to some extent*, I don't think it's working though. As for texting it's a bad habit. If I don't like talking to someone I genuinely just forget to reply or I don't want to and I leave it at that but they keep pushing it it's really uncomfortable, so I don't think much can be done there. I guess I'll try to confront them about it, if not then just low key avoid them. I don't know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchkiss 1,888 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Just tell them they are basic and that you hate em Sent from my iPhone using OneHallyu mobile app Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teddythedog 1,497 Posted October 17, 2016 Share Posted October 17, 2016 Be honest but very polite. Don't burn the bridge though as your paths may cross in the future who knows. Sent from my iPhone using OneHallyu mobile app Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minassi 90 Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 I guess you have to distance yourself from them and let them know because if you don't, they're going to wonder what's wrong...I hope things work out well! You're going to eventually have to do so, so the time might as well be now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gloupipoo 1,619 Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 Last time I told this chick that we should distance ourselves because she was draining all my energy and I had no time for her negativity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arineunha 352 Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 tell them you need space Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ripiaoppa 15,307 Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 Distance yourself from them and slowly ye will start to drift apart Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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