shinymeanho 81 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 So I have this friend who, for some reason, doesn't like looking at me when we talk. Within my friend group she only looks at one person whenever she talks, even if it's a "group" discussion. I noticed that whenever she talks to our other friend, she looks her dead in the eye and converses with her like it's no big deal. However, when we're by ourselves, she barely looks at me at all, and idek why. Does anybody else hate this, too? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Temptastic VII 6,473 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 Yes. Yes I hate this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashelin 2,418 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 She's probably shy and is more comfortable around her other friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fari. 1,504 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 i'm sometimes like that. it depends on who i'm comfortable with Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shinymeanho 81 Posted December 13, 2013 Author Share Posted December 13, 2013 She's probably shy and is more comfortable around her other friend. It's funny that you say that because we've been friends for around 12-13 years now. But it does feel like that because we're drifting apart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deaneira 581 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 sometimes people tend to do that . what i do is , i said to them " it's better if you look at people eyes when you talk to them to show that you're really talking to people " . it's a sign of respecting people when you talk to them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshiner 1,054 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 I think looking at someone when you're speaking to them is pretty important, it shows engagement in the conversation but also respect for who is talking. I can't stand it if someone doesn't even bother to look at you when you're talking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miLoDy 1,988 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 Ugh me and my "friend" is drifting apart too but yes, I don't like it when people do that because I think it's rude. There are other cultures though that they think eye contact is RUDE which is the opposite of mine's. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjongkeys 1,201 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 She might just be shy? Or maybe she feels more comfortable with her other friend? I'm sure she'll get past it eventually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hustle 11,537 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 I don't like it either. Eye contact is an important part of communication. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
North and South 4,680 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 I am actually an offender. I have to take conscious effort to look at people in the eye when talking. I was told in Junior high by my, rather annoyed, teacher and ever since then I've always tried to look at people when talking, but its still difficult. I can understand why it would be frustrating for the receiving end. It probably looks like the person is uncomfortable with you, or that they don't want to be there. I don't know the specifics about your situation but for me, while sometimes it was because I didn't like conversing with the person, most of the times my habit was due to excessive shyness, I didn't like people looking at my face because I felt self conscious. I also found it easier to voice my thoughts and organize them without having the pressure of looking at someone and having to judge from their facial reactions whether or not they also are interested. I also had a thing where I would think that if I wasn't looking at someone and talking then I wouldn't have to face them properly, and in that manner I wouldn't have to worry about what they liked/ disliked or fear that they disliking me. It was a self esteem issue for me, and unfortunately the habit didn't die out completely. I'm extremely social with my friends or people I judge to be comfortable with, usually people with similar interests or people who are of a more accepting nature. Other than that, I tend to get really shy and awkward, and then I stare at the floor when I talk to people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinypuffling 943 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 When I talk to people I rarely look at them dead in the eye for extended periods unless I/they have something extremely serious or important to say..I mean I look at them face to face, but just not always directly in the eye. Idk.. I think direct eye contact is awkward and too personal. But that might be due to my culture's upbringing. If you look someone dead in the eye for too long its like you're asking for a fight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ulmicola 1,981 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 I actually have to remember to look at people when I talk, it's not something that comes naturally to me. When someone can't look at someone else during a conversation, it usually isn't because of rudeness (even though I can be incredibly rude sometimes...), but shyness and awkwardness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denizen mars 5,911 Posted December 13, 2013 Share Posted December 13, 2013 I literally get eye fatigue when I stare at someone's eyes for too long. IDK how to even describe it. So I make eye contact on and off, just enough to make people think I'm normal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gloupsidou 2,047 Posted December 14, 2013 Share Posted December 14, 2013 I only look away when I get caught staring at cute boys. Maybe she likes you as more than a chingu. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nokuto 319 Posted December 14, 2013 Share Posted December 14, 2013 Most of my friends do make eye contact but if im having a serious conversation and someone is just looking away it really bugs me. When you do that out of shyness though i think its different and distinguishable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vaelin 6,957 Posted December 14, 2013 Share Posted December 14, 2013 This is such a dilemma for me. since highschool I got this eye disease and you don't notice from distance but from up close you can see. I hate when people think I'm rude but I just don't want them to look in my eyes because I feel emberassed about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jihyo's Heart Shaker 1,087 Posted December 15, 2013 Share Posted December 15, 2013 It's weird. When I look at them, they don't look at me, but when I don't look at them, they end up looking at me. Make up your damn mind. -.- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harley. 78 Posted December 15, 2013 Share Posted December 15, 2013 I don't like it either. Eye contact is an important part of communication. it's funny that you say that and then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hustle 11,537 Posted December 15, 2013 Share Posted December 15, 2013 it's funny that you say that and then http://25.media.tumblr.com/63a308ab3e68c63b0d57e47be0a05a0f/tumblr_mr46jpyeWB1qg0y0wo3_250.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xoSARANGHAE 214 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 i hate that. sometimes its because the person is intimidated by you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoplz 2,333 Posted December 19, 2013 Share Posted December 19, 2013 Sounds to me she is guilty about something If y'all been friends for more than a decade Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANCAN 124 Posted December 22, 2013 Share Posted December 22, 2013 Eye contact is just something I'm not good at haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nekci 1,995 Posted December 22, 2013 Share Posted December 22, 2013 I hate it because I think the person isn't listening Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deja-Vu 215 Posted December 22, 2013 Share Posted December 22, 2013 Yes, I really hate when a person I'm talking to doesn't look at me or especially when they yawn. I feel like they show they are bored. As well I noticed some of my colleagues when being in a group of people just concentrate only on one person and don't look at others. I just consider that rude. I always try to make eye contact with everyone if talkng in a group. Though I understand when people are shy and they just like to look at someone who they are the most comfortable with. But when it happens with people who are self-absorbed and arrogant who feel like you don't deserve their attention - this is very annoying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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