MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 Some of us are either.. graduating, graduated, in grad school... have our jobs and etc etc... I was wondering at this point in your life has anyone in your family/friends pushed you into the thoughts of dating, marriage and or having kids and what have you told them? Are you ready and does it annoy you when they force it and or push it on you? For me my cousins whom are 21,18 and 16 are ready for me to have children O_O lol... (they trippin) I am still in the mind set of no kids. I was at toys r us with my friend and inside is baby's r us and HOLY fuck I saw a stroller for 500 bucks and car seats for 200... like NOPE. Even pacifiers are 6 bucks like... WTF kids are too expensive ... I don't want them anytime soon but some people around me are settling down and having kids.... I'm just not ready... I have no real pressure yet but seeing my friends whom I've graduated with getting married and popping out babies makes me feel like somethings coming my way soon... sorta told my bf that my friend whom is 20 is getting married and he was like well its okay its normal... nothing wrong with that ... which is true but... I feel its alot when your 20 years old to already settle...idk... maybe its just me... Anyways.... what about you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocumentaLy 6,033 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 I'm gay so there is no pressure. Plus my family said that my cold nature wouldn't be good for having children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wiaraewiwiarae 6,637 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 My family (including extended family) is awesome, they never demand anything from me, instead they give me their full support and money. I'm spoiled rotten. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 I'm gay so there is no pressure. Plus my family said that my cold nature wouldn't be good for having children. Do you want to get married? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bearclaw 3,543 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 I feel like kids shouldn't really be a topic brought up until late twenties or early thirties. but that's meee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
night vale. 8,071 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 I'm not at that age where my mom is going "you need to marry someone," even though a lot of the people I graduated high school with are already married with at least one child (wtf). When I date, it's never that serious. I'd like kids but not now. my family isn't at that stage of pressuring me (yet). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiddo 1,285 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 I say just take your time. You don't have to do what everyone else is doing. It's your life, so might as well do whatever makes you happy. If having children would make u happy, then go for it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 I feel like kids shouldn't really be a topic brought up until late twenties or early thirties. but that's meee AGREE. My adult family isn't like that Thank god.. just my cousins wanting to spoil kids lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yeokdae 3,324 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 i put more stress on myself about marriage/children then my family does. the weird thing is that i know without a doubt that i'm not ready for either (though i do want them eventually), i have a few few friends and cousins who are married/getting married (two with kids) and it makes me feel like i'm lagging behind and i should, even though, like i said, i don't want to. i just think the rest of them are waaaay too young to be getting married. telling myself that is the only thing making me feel like I'M not the problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune 1,667 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 I'm 23, and a lesbian. Yet my Mom still whines about wanting grandkids from me. I think that's probably the biggest reason she doesn't want me to be gay just so i'll have kids. When honestly, even if I was straight I just don't really want to have children, and might never want to. Maybe I'll adopt in the future, but it all depends. And honestly even at my age I still have the mindset of someone younger, I just don't want to settle down yet and have no motivation to do so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
denizen mars 5,911 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 my mom thinks I'm too much of a potato to find someone, probably. She'd never pressure me to have children. Sometimes when I see people my age or slightly older getting married, I think, 'what am I doing with my life that I haven't found someone like them?' but I know I have plenty of time left (I'm only 23). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clay 11,273 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 I'm studying medicals so like I will end my studies when I'm at least 25yo (might even go to 30yo), so my family already knows it will take me time to marry or anything so they don't mention this at all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 I say just take your time. You don't have to do what everyone else is doing. It's your life, so might as well do whatever makes you happy. If having children would make u happy, then go for it. Fuck Kids... (sorry for that) but they are pooping and screaming machines how do people do it? I have no real pressure its just its everywhere now with ppl my age 20-24... I want to travel at least 2 places before I even marry. I wanna do a lot... It's just crazy I'm seeing do many 20 something starting to get married... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilah 203 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 My parents don't care about whether my siblings and I date/get married/have kids or not. Our eldest brother got married at 18 and has 4 kids, so they have grand children covered. The only people who ask about why I don't date are my aunts, they're always trying to set me up with people when I see them (which isn't very often, thank God). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nutella 6,108 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 sometimes i want kids but most of the time i am afraid of the commitment and lack of time afterwards plus what it will do to my body my family wants me to have kids but i am not ready Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PD101 Rep: BoA 1,183 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 That's a hard pass on children unless I get to the point where I'm extremely financially stable and secure with a plan A and B as far as safety nets. Only if I get to THAT point would I consider a single child. I don't feel marriage is necessary, to be honest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 I'm studying medicals so like I will end my studies when I'm at least 25yo (might even go to 30yo), so my family already knows it will take me time to marry or anything so they don't mention this at all Good and Congrats in Medschool I will finish law school soon... so I think thats when I'll get those calls like... ummm time for babies lol but my grandma knows I hate children thats why she hasn't even asked Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunny_ 1,308 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 My family always push me to have a relationship, I do understand them though since I probably would be happier in one. But other than that, they don't push. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 sometimes i want kids but most of the time i am afraid of the commitment and lack of time afterwards plus what it will do to my body my family wants me to have kids but i am not ready You sound like me with kids. I cant deal with my little cousins and I have a bad temper ... and I already have this fear of pregnancy in general Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocumentaLy 6,033 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 Do you want to get married? I'm not all about marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belle. 3,407 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 Well I am 24 I already graduated and mom keeps nagging that I should meet a man and have a life I don't mind but still I have many things I want to do before I have a man Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
INFINITE SHOWTIME 1,792 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 Fuck Kids... (sorry for that) but they are pooping and screaming machines how do people do it? well, you were a pooping and screaming machine one day as well so be grateful that your parents actually raised you and didn't see you as a "pooping and screaming machine" ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 i put more stress on myself about marriage/children then my family does. the weird thing is that i know without a doubt that i'm not ready for either (though i do want them eventually), i have a few few friends and cousins who are married/getting married (two with kids) and it makes me feel like i'm lagging behind and i should, even though, like i said, i don't want to. i just think the rest of them are waaaay too young to be getting married. telling myself that is the only thing making me feel like I'M not the problem. I'm with you on that. I think when you see it around you... you think FUCK why am I not there but think about it. You have so much time to be free because some of my friends whom are married cant really do much because they have other commitments now.. It's not like a Yes lets go get shit faced (i don't really get SF just an example... I'm a good drinker ... sometimes lol) they have to tell their husbands and have to be home at a certain time or they cant because their pregnant or they have kids. I'm like SHIT I have next to no party buddies anymore... like their best friend is their husbands now.. so think about as in you are a free bird and you can have fun and when you feel fun is overrated thats when its time ... at least thats what I think Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nutella 6,108 Posted November 23, 2015 Share Posted November 23, 2015 You sound like me with kids. I cant deal with my little cousins and I have a bad temper ... and I already have this fear of pregnancy in general i have a huge fear of pregnancy what it does to your body, 9 months of being hormonal and the birth just thinking about it gives me shivers this nice pregnant lady once pretty much forced me to touch her belly and I felt her baby and thought it was disgusting my mom says it is beautiful but Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MidnightEXO 12,909 Posted November 23, 2015 Author Share Posted November 23, 2015 well, you were a pooping and screaming machine one day as well so be grateful that your parents actually raised you and didn't see you as a "pooping and screaming machine" ... True True.... I just see how kids act and It freaks me out and I know I'm the one raising the kid but IDK how some people do it... I give it up to people that have multiple at the same time like how does drive you crazy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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