ETB5 4,512 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 This will be a bit lengthy. I think I like one of my closest friends, a girl I shall name "Amelia" (not her real name). We are really good friends ( we both are not the type to have many friends, but rather a small but close group) and I've liked her since I transferred to her high school 2 years ago (I am now in my first year of University). I say I think I like her, because I'm not sure if this is what love is?? Like, I think about her every day and I often catch myself smiling when thinking of her. I'm not sure if this is love. I can also say that I'm attracted physically to her. I'm 99% sure she likes me as well since, among other things, one of our friends (her best friend) once asked me "Do you like Amelia??" to which I said yes and she replied "What are you waiting for? Tell her". (would you agree that this is a pretty strong sign that she likes me?). Anyway, this is where things get complicated. My education has always been my biggest priority (well, my family as well) which is why I've never been in a relationship since a relationship would require time which I would have to take away from my studies. We are now attending different universities, but we are only a couple hours away from each other. I'm attending the most prestigious university in my country and I'm doing amazingly well (I'm doing a double major and have the highest grade in one major and one of the highest in the other major). However, I destine almost my entire time (including weekends), when I'm not in class, to studying. I'm also very ambitious and have big aspirations. I know I can achieve them as long as I keep working hard in school and focusing almost exclusively on my academics and extracurricular activities (for 4 more years). At the same time, lately I've been thinking that I don't want to end up alone and that prospect honestly scares me. I would consider myself a relatively selfless person and I am the happiest when I'm with others whom I love. Even so, I know I would be miserable if I didn't fulfill my goals. I still haven't told Amelia that I like her because, assuming she likes me back, I wouldn't be able to do anything. Getting into a relationship with her, or anyone else, would be selfish since I would not be able to dedicate time to them and our relationship. I'm scared that even after graduating (after which I'm going to graduate school) my work ethic and my ambition will continue to inhibit my personal life. This is a difficult situation for me . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nev Schulman 7,948 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 First of all ending up alone is not as bad as it seems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Case closed 496 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 You can do both. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunny 5,676 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 relationships definitely need time, dedication, work etc! especially a new one, i think you will run into problems if you get into a relationship right now especially if you don't live closeby..i mean you could text or skype or something but you still need to dedicate a lot of time. if you really feel that you wouldn't have enough time to give her then maybe dating her wouldn't be the best idea...you could definitely talk to her about it? or maybe you'll find an equally ambitious person to be with idk your ambition is inspiring but remember that play is just as important as work and don't overwork yourself or forget other aspects of life too ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScarletWhimsy 2,203 Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 If you're doing very well already and think you have a good grasp on your academic life, then go for it. If she is a good friend and you like her that much, don't let time and opportunities slip away. In terms of aspirations, you still have much time ahead for you. People sometimes don't hang around that long, unfortunately. There is no right/wrong, good/bad advice. You really have to weigh in your heart what's the most important thing for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sylar 521 Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 tell her do it do it now before its too late and somebody else has got hold of her if she likes you back you can talk this over with her and figure things out see if you guys truly match if you guys do, you will find a way to be in a happy relationship and still being able to work on school stuff don't worry so much already, first things first tell her you LOOOOVVEEE her Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HOT PINK 264 Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 I wish I was more like you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mouse 530 Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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