helloworld 7 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 I feel like such a bad person asking this, but I really need to. I’ve had this group of friends since the 6th grade, and we’re all ending our senior year. My best friend belongs to this group. At first, I didn’t notice, but as time progressed, I realised that she’s jealous, clingy, changes mood quickly, and sees everything involving me as a competition. I thought that she wasn't really like that and that I was just overanalysing stuff, until the 11th grade, when we had a conflict. I have low self-esteem, and while I don’t see her directly making me feel more insecure with words, she makes me feel trapped in my insecurities. I thought that leaving to a college faraway (as were my plans) would help me distance myself and think, but once she heard what college I was going to attend she decided to apply and now she’s planning to attend too (even though she’d told me before knowing I was going to apply that she wasn’t planning on going there). This is my dream college and I now feel horrible about going there because of her. I feel as if there’s no escape for me, even though she’ll be in a completely different campus. I know she’ll try to cling to me over there, and I want some space to think and understand my feelings. I’m not sure what I should do. I don’t know if this feeling of confinement I feel is due to a toxic group of friends or because of my own self-esteem issues. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XStan 313 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 College is a life changer. Do not room with her. Dont schedule classes with her and if your lucky her part in your life will diminish. Unhealthy friendships are one thing that everybody in college is looking to shed. Youll find a group that you will be closer to than you ever thought possible. Be strong and good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rapmon's Ahjussi Husband 2,299 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 Is hard to keep childhood friends, and at a point of life you will need them, so keep that in mind; Maybe she is decided to go there because she thinks you are a friend and can help her to feeel more like home; my life advise is whatever you decide don't act in the rush of the moment and don't be harsh to her, you may regret it latter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chioma 4,091 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 Wow your strong, i would have bitch slapped her if she acted that way to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seaweed 866 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 I think you should be honest with her. It's better for you and better for her in the long run. She might hate you for some time, but it'll pass. I've been there. Also what XStan said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScarletWhimsy 2,203 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 College is a very important decision for your life, so please don't feel pressured to change your decision on your dream school because of this. It's a whole new world, and a very big one so just distance yourself and meet new people. It really sounds like this friend is weighing you down, and you deserve to start anew so if she insistently tries to continue bothering you in the future, maybe you should try being honest with her and telling her straight out how you feel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SAYAKA 9,964 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 i actually had a friend like that once. One who always put me down to make her self feel better and loved to show off her wealthy upper middle-class lifestyle to me for some reason (as if my parents can't afford the same things her parents did). Anyhow she was obsessed with popularity and ended up migrating away from me and making new friends Once you reach college, and as you say she will be in a different campus, odds are you probably won't really get to see her. A lot of things change in college. If it helps and you want to have her completely out of your life just ignore her OR lessen the amount of time you spend with her. You'll be in college on a different campus and you have your own time to think about how you feel about her. There's always the option of telling her how you feel too. Tell her that she is clingy, jealous, moody and in some weird competition with you. Maybe you'll be able to work things out and get passed this and develop a healthier friendship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neph 84 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 It's very easy to distantiate yourself from people when you get to college, being in different careers and stuff you naturally tend to make friends with those close around you. Also you can always just ignore her or tell her what you think is wrong in your friendship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice_ 1,328 Posted March 18, 2015 Share Posted March 18, 2015 Pretty much what Xstan said. LOL College is....a weird time. You are mature in this time but you will have some upgraded drama than school. My opinions are : don't room with her. Find a new friend. Involve in a group. That's it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PoshLuxe 689 Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 You probably won't see her much in college, and it's a slim chance that you'll be rooming with her, especially since I'm sure you didn't request each other. If she does try to hunt you down and invade your life, confront her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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