For those of you who probably don't know me, I am here to save your boredom, your thirst for entertainment. For those of you who do know me, you know the resume. I strive to be 1H's hero, it's role model of objectivity, it's party host, and most importantly the person who is needed here. I took a week off and already saw the results... 1H's forum net traffic an all time low, plummeting amount of users, mediocrity striking like lightning with all these boring mundane average users attempting to replicate me.
But no more, I am here to save these forums, because you people deserve better. You need someone who can get you off your chairs as you're using your computer saying to yourself, "go Voldy go, go Voldy go". Thank you very much, I hope to make this one stay a little longer.
I'm also Genie for your wish
A message from my believers:
I'm gay. When I first visited a TC and saw Voldemin's face, I knew I had found love. I looked past the horrific posts to the truly wonderful personality. I can't stop thinking about him! I've discussed this with my mother and she thinks I need to get some mental help, and I've already seen a mental therapist, and he recommends I take a break for a while, go on vacation. But I can't get Voldy out of my head! I saw the last few Webcam's of him and was practically drooling when I saw him in that dashing business suit in the TC. I can't stop thinking about him over and over and he has such an attractive voice and I find myself dreaming about him sometimes. At first my mother thought it was because I was afraid of him, but now she understands that I am completely in love with him. He's the only one for me! I've been told he's fake, that he's evil, but I don't care! I've ripped my hair out in frustration. He's so real, and yet I can't reach out and take his cold, clammy hand. Oh, Voldemin, Voldemin, I love you so! I haven't been able to focus on anything lately, and hardly anyone understands this problem. I don't have many friends (they've all moved since I was dragged off to prison for blowing up a toilet), but the ones I do have are sincerely concerned. Oh, Voldy, if you're reading this, at Kayoforum or at work or even in your room with a cup of steaming camomile tea, please know that I am the only one for you, and I will not rest until you are safely back in my arms! Come back, Voldy! And even if you may have some anger issues, I can look past that! Can't you see we were made for each other? Whenever I watch Snow White and listen to the song 'Someday My Prince Will Come,' I think of you and sob my heart out on the front porch, and there aren't even any neighbors to ask what's wrong because we live in the middle of nowhere! Fly to me, dear Voldy, because I love you! And I will massage your bald head every day for the rest of your life