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I opened up to my current bf about getting abused by my ex boyfriend and his reaction was basically this “Still, because of that event, you were able to meet me. I am a pacifist ㅋㅋ” I...wasn’t expecting that kind of reaction at all. I thought he would be..more like “wtf is wrong with that guy? Are you okay? And then I told him directly that I thought he would be more worried about me and he said from now on with him, it’ll be a good time. Am I overreacting?

I didn’t know how extreme of the effect of her death would take a toll on me. I survived my attempt two times. But sometimes, like now, I regret it even though I love my family so much and I don’t want to see them cry like that again. After Sulli’s death, I felt so frozen. How is the world forward? I cannot comprehend but I know time waits for no one.I’ve been crying for days now. I feel so lonely. I’m seeing a therapist right now but I still feel so lonely. I know there are many people in similar or worse situation, but why do I feel this lonely and hurt? I feel like my heart is breaking. The pain in my heart and mind is getting too much for me to handle. I just want to say I’m sorry to anyone on this site that I’ve hurt. I’m sorry.

After Sulli’s death, I feel like I’ve fallen back into my dark place. At times I regret not being able to go through with my own suicide. But then I feel so guilty because I love my parents so much

Omg is that Maya??

Thank you so much. I really needed to hear that. I feel like if I tell someone irl, they will just laugh at me or think I’m ridiculous for feeling this way about a celebrity but she was more than just that for me. I’m the type of person who always says yes and I’m always scared of being different because I would get bullied. But seeing Sulli fight against the norm of outcasting those with different ideals gave me so much hope and happiness that I too could be like that one day. And then hearing about this....it breaks me. It breaks me not because I think it broke my fantasy or ideal of who I thought sulli was but it breaks because I know exactly the type of pain that would lead to a drastic decision like this. And I would never ever wish this kind of pain upon my worst enemy. The hardest thing to fight is against one’s own mind. I’ve been doing that since I was 13 and now I’m 26 and reached my breaking point as well

I stayed away from Kpop for a while and when I came back I heard of this news and it just totally shattered me. I only started seeing my therapist maybe a month ago. She’s really amazing and kind. I’ve been trying to utilize the exercises we learned but I keep falling down. I’m not seeing a psychiatrist because I don’t want to depend on medications yet. If the therapy doesn’t work out, I’ll consider seeing a psychiatrist

Is it weird that I’ve been crying so much over her? She doesn’t know of my existence. Hell I never even cried over an American celebrity. I never ever cried over anyone famous actually but for some reason I can’t stop crying now. In August, I tried committing suicide. My friend reported me to the police and since then I’ve been seeing a therapist. Things seem to go alright for a while..I guess. I’m taking a break from school and literally doing nothing at home and I got rejected from all part time job I applied to. But even that didn’t shatter me as much after I met my therapist. I started to gain more hope that I could make it to the end regardless of how bleak my future seemed. But now all that hope seems to disappear. Maybe it’s cause I’ve been a fan of them for such a long time and sulli was someone I respected and loved for a long time. Even if the world (or at least Korea) turned their backs on her, she was someone I always believed in and now that she’s gone..it just hurts so badly. I can’t even describe the pain, I’m literally sobbing like an idiot while I write this.

I’ve seen so many people criticize Korean netizens and yes they do deserve it but are we any better? From way back on Hallyu8 until now, I’ve seen so many hateful and disgusting comments on this site as well. Remember when the bashing thread was active? It was users on here who maliciously took a gif of Sana changing her leg position and used it to slut shame her. It was users on here who sexually harassed Jennie after rumors of her dating Teddy came out and took a bunch of video to ruthlessly spit hate while disguising it as just criticism. It was users on here who said CL probably slept with some US producers to get to where she is. And I know there were lots more disgusting things said and done by users on here about other idols. We tend to forget that celebrities are also human beings with a mother and father who loves them so it’s so easy for us to spew hatred and bullshit behind our screens. But how many people have to die for people to realize a change is necessary? After another idol’s death, everything seemed peaceful on this site and then the ugly fan wars started again. The hate comments started again. We have grief for a few days and the next day went right back to the usual activity that has contributed to a death of an innocent one. And I’m no angel either. I also said many things I regret and I hate myself for it. Fandom rivalry..it happens. But it’s been going too far for a long time. I think to see changes implemented, it’s best to start with yourself first. I might get downvoted and I might get angry comments and that’s okay. But I don’t want this to be another incident that’s forgotten in a few days. I don’t want this vicious cycle of bullying to continue anymore and I know I can’t control what other people do but please. Please think before you write something malicious about others. Words are a type of poison that is the hardest to cure. To anyone who is going through a hard time right now, even if we never met, I want to hug you.

You: 9/10 Now watching the Handmaiden’s Tale

Not a drama but I just finished watching the movie, Intimate Strangers. It’s a good movie to pass the time and the acting was really good! Not surprised considering the cast. 7/10

Finished Love, Death and Robot: 10/10 Black Mirror S5: 5/10 Now watching You

Strangers:8/10

Anomalisa:7/10

Swing Kids: 10/10 Fantastic movie. It made me laugh and cry at the same time. This movie made me see D.O in a new light

JON DOESNT DESERVE GHOST FUCK HIS BITCH ASS

Thank fuck someone also thinks the same way about avengers. Infinity War is 1000 times better

WOMEN ARE THE BEST

THE WOMEN OF GOT ARE THE BEST OF ALL TIME!! MY QUEEN ARYA DID THAT THOUGH

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: 7/10

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Secret Forest (Stranger)

Sky Castle: 10/10

Avengers Endgame: 5/10 Meh

Will be starting You

Haunting of House Hill: 10/10 Great story and acting and perfect amount of scariness